Thursday 18 June 2009

Shyness


Another article on Shyness 

A shy person wants very much social success — wants to be liked by other people but is afraid to make the first step. Behind his or her timid behaviour hides an inner storm. Shy people continually think of themselves in a negative way and are excessively preoccupied with what others think of them. Instead of simply meeting and talking with friends, they wildly build plans about how to make a favourable impression on them. At the same time they are so worried that they actually begin to experience physical symptoms of stress — their adrenaline rushes, their heart accelerates and their whole body prepares to flee. 

Shy people should not be confused with introverts — persons who are focused on their inner world, who prefer solitude by their very nature. Introverts know how to be with others, are not afraid to socialize and have a healthy sense of self-esteem which is necessary for successful interaction among people but they are content to be alone. Shy people, however, like very much to be with others but they lack the social skills and the self-esteem to accomplish this. 

Shyness has many unpleasant consequences: it is difficult for shy people to meet people and start new friendships. This frequently leads to loneliness and even depression. Shy people have difficulty thinking clearly in the presence of others. They often behave in a conceited way or as if they are not interested in others while they are simply worried about possible rejection. They constantly obsess about everything associated with their behaviour and appearance. Shy people are so shy that they can be intimidated by their own shyness. Their main trouble is that they spend so much time on their self-preoccupation that they have no time or interest to look outside. (Please note that the shy person may not be conscious of his or her behaviour as described above.) 

On a positive note, shy people frequently have a gift of knowing how to listen to others. It is easy for them to learn to pay attention to and empathize with others. They usually have close and loyal friends who value and respect them. And we always need people who know how to hear us out. 

- Source Unknown 

Shyness has a strange element of narcissism, a belief that how we look, how we perform, is truly important to other people. - André Dubus 

The way you overcome shyness is to become so wrapped up in something that you forget to be afraid. - Lady Bird Johnson 

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