Monday 11 December 2017

Humour

It’s not that diabetes, heart disease and obesity runs in your family. It’s that no one runs in your family. - Unknown

Beds last on an average much longer than marriages. - Michel Houellebecq

Get at least eight hours of beauty sleep, nine if you’re ugly. - Betty White

Never use a big word when a little filthy one will do. - Johnny Carson

Marriage does not unite two people; it entangles them. - Abraham Miller

Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves. - Phyllis Diller

One hundred percent of divorces start with a marriage. - Mark Gungor

People seldom notice old clothes if you wear a big smile. - Lee Mildon

Just remember, if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off. - Unknown

Lawyers are fleas on the hide of human nature. - Stephen King

I am certain there is too much certainty in the world. - Michael Crichton

Eat right, exercise regularly, die anyway. - Unknown

Click Here for more humorous quotes, or Here for the book ‘Of Wit ‘n’ Humour’

 

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