Strange

              A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, ‘Here lies Strange, an honest man and a lawyer.’

              The inscriber insisted that such an inscription would be confusing, for passers-by would tend to think that three men were buried under the stone. However he suggested an alternative: ‘Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer.’ 

              That way, whenever anyone walked by the tombstone and read it, they would be certain to remark: “That’s Strange.” 

Heaven On Earth

              A woman was worried whether or not her dead husband made it to heaven, so she decided to try to contact his spirit by having a séance.

              Sure enough, after the usual mumbo-jumbo of calling to the spirits, her husband’s voice was heard answering, “Hello Margaret, this is meeee...” 

              “Fred,” she answered. “I just have to know if you’re happy there in the afterlife. What's it like there?” 

              “Ooooooh, it’s much more beautiful here than I ever imagined,” Fred answered. "The sky is bluer, the air is cleaner, and the pastures are much more lush and green than I ever expected. And the only thing we do, all day long, are eat and sleep, eat and sleep, over and over."

              “Thank God, you made it to heaven,” his wife cried. 

              “Heaven?” he answered. “What heaven? I’m a buffalo in Montana."

Sooner Or Later ...

Sooner or later, a man, if he is wise, discovers that life is a mixture of good days and bad, victory and defeat, give and take. He learns that it doesn’t pay to let things get his goat; that he must let some things go over his head like water off a duck's back. He learns that carrying a chip on his shoulder is the quickest way to get into a fight. He learns that buck-passing acts as a boomerang. He learns that carrying tales and gossip about others is the surest way to become unpopular. He learns that giving others a mental lift by showing appreciation and praise is the best way to lift his own spirits. He learns that the world will not end when he fails or makes an error; that there is always another day and another chance. He learns that listening is frequently more important than talking, and that he can often make a friend by letting the other fellow tell his troubles. He learns that all men have burnt toast for breakfast now and then, and that he shouldn’t let their grumbling get him down. He learns that people are not any more difficult to get along with in one place than another, and that ‘getting along’ depends about 98 per cent on his own behavior. - Unknown

Speech by Chetan Bhagat at Symbiosis

An excerpt from a speech by Chetan Bhagat - an author from India - given at the orientation program for the new batch of MBA students Symbiosis, Pune, July 24, 2008.

Don't just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order. There is no point in getting a promotion on the day of your break-up. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.

Life is one of those races in nursery school where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same is with life where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die.

One thing about nurturing the spark - don't take life seriously. Life is not meant to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a prepaid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up?

It's ok, bunk a few classes, scoring low in couple of papers, goof up a few interviews, take leave from work, fall in love, little fights with your spouse. We are people, not programmed devices.

Be Grateful

Be grateful for the kindly friends that walk along your way;
Be grateful for the skies of blue that smile from day to day;
Be grateful for the health you own, the work you find to do,
For round about you there are men less fortunate than you.

Be grateful for the growing trees, the roses soon to bloom,
The tenderness of kindly hearts that shared your days of gloom;
Be grateful for the morning dew, the grass beneath your feet,
The soft caresses of your babes and all their laughter sweet.

Acquire the grateful habit, learn to see how blest you are,
How much there is to gladden life, how little life to mar!
And what if rain shall fall today and you with grief are sad;
Be grateful that you can recall the joys that you have had.

- Edgar Albert Guest