Life's Little Lessons

Our lives might not have come with a manual, an instruction booklet to teach us what to do, or how to live our life. But if we are willing to listen to our elders, to learn from the sages and wise men before us, we will be able to get a pretty good start on life, avoiding all the portholes that are dotted along life’s journey.

The following words of wisdom are short and easy to remember. Do take a few moments to have a look. Maybe there is something that is useful to you.

We work so consistently to disguise ourselves to others that we end by being disguised to ourselves. - Duc de La Rochefoucauld

A gentle word, a kind look, a good-natured smile can work wonders and accomplish miracles. - William Hazlitt

There is always something to upset the most careful of human calculations. - Ihara Saikaku

If something seems far too big for you to cope with, maybe it is because you are meant to share the load with someone else. - Unknown

What I said never changed anyone. What they understood did. - Unknown

One of the greatest pains to human nature is the pain of a new idea. - Walter Bagehot

Before we set our hearts too much on anything, let us examine how happy are those who already possess it. - Duc de La Rochefoucauld

He that has energy enough to root out a vice should go further, and try to plant a virtue in its place. - Charles Colton

Even though you know a thousand things, ask the man who knows one. - Unknown

It is amazing how complete is the delusion that beauty is goodness. - Leo Tolstoy

There is an art of reading, as well as an art of thinking, and an art of writing. - Clarence Day

A gentleman would be ashamed should his deeds not match his words. - Confucius

What is Life?

What is life? Do you know? Well, the simple answer is…

Energy… Life, is energy. It is the energy that makes your heart beat and makes you breathe, that causes the cells of your body to automatically grow and reproduce the moment you are conceived! - Tae Yun Kim

That is the simple answer to life. However, when we talk about life, we are talking about the living of the mundane, ‘physical’ life. Now, that is another thing altogether. You will find that life is a mystery... unpredictable, and constantly, a struggle.

In the real world, life is difficult. People will quarrel with you, take advantage of you. You’ll fight with your family, your friends and colleagues.You’ll lose best friends you thought would always be there. You’ll cry, and you’ll laugh. You will be happy, and you will be sad. Some days you will feel so blissful, and some days you will feel so miserable. You will find that life is constantly, a coaster ride.

You’ll learn things that will change you forever. You will find that the more you learn, the more you know, the more you don’t know. Some days, you will find that you have a pretty good grasp on how things work, and at other times, you are completely baffled by how anything works.

One day, you will understand, in life, shit happens. If you can handle it, you will emerge stronger and wiser. And ultimately, you will come to the realization that none of these matter at all for, dust to dust do we return. This is life.

Real life is an ambiguous world, where actions sometimes had no meaning, where chaos reigned and no one was allowed to see the big picture, only their small portion of it. - Bentley Little

Life is a battle in which you are to show your pluck, and woe be to the coward. Whether passed on a bed of sickness or a tented field, it is ever the same fair play and admits no foolish distinction. Despair and postponement are cowardice and defeat. Men were born to succeed, not to fail. - Henry David Thoreau

Do not be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better. What if they are a little coarse, and you may get your coat soiled or torn? What if you do fail, and get fairly rolled in the dirt once or twice. Up again, you shall never be so afraid of a tumble. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Life is composed of lights and shadows, and we would be untruthful, insincere, and saccharine if we tried to pretend there were no shadows. Most things are good, and they are the strongest things; but there are evil things too, and you are not doing a child a favour by trying to shield him from reality. The important thing is to teach a child that good can always triumph over evil. - Walt Disney

A long series of what-if's that lead from one moment to the next; time never pausing for you to catch your breath, to make sense of the cards that have been handed to you. And all you can do is play your cards and hope for the best, because in the end, it all comes back to those three basics. Fate, Luck, Chance. - Kelseyleigh Reber

Life is the most exciting opportunity we have. But we have one shot. You graduate from college once, and that’s it. You’re going out of that nest. And you have to find that courage that’s deep, deep, deep in there. Every step of the way. - Andrew Shue

How is it that one day life is orderly and you are content, a little cynical perhaps but on the whole just so, and then without warning you find the solid floor is a trapdoor and you are now in another place whose geography is uncertain and whose customs are strange? - Jeanette Winterson

Now… The eternal present is the space within which your whole life unfolds, the one factor that remains constant. Life is now. There was never a time when your life was not now, nor will there ever be. - Eckhart Tolle

A New Apartment

A friend of mine collected the keys to his apartment recently. It is a Housing Development Board Apartment – meaning the apartment is built by the Housing Development Board of Singapore. These apartments are heavily subsidized, and only citizens are eligible to buy them. However, there are requirements you need to fulfill first. So, due to HDB rules, and reasons not my place to tell, my friend ended up buying a 36 sq. meter, (about 390 sq.feet), apartment.

I tag along to have a look at the apartment, curious to see how small it is. Here are some pictures to give you some perspectives.

This is the kitchen to the right of the apartment as you enter the door.

Adjacent to the kitchen, is the toilet.

Followed by the bedroom, with sliding doors, presumably to save space.

This is the hall – picture taken standing at the bedroom door.

This is a diagonal view of the room from one corner of the apartment.

There is a small storeroom, which doubles as an air raid shelter.

That was it - the whole apartment. I guess it is rather tight. For someone like my friend, who is living in a four room apartment now, it will take some getting use to.

However, I have been told that a place like this in Hong Kong is a luxury - if you could afford it. They cost an arm and a leg. And even if you can afford it, there is a long waiting time for them. Such an apartment would house a family of four or more.

For a single person, if you design, and plan it right, it should be all right. Sure, there is not much space, but it is still your home, your sanctuary, your castle.

This is the view down, from the window. Work is still in progress.

This is the view to the left from the window.

This is the view straight ahead from the window.

And this is the view to the right.

Maybe I will do an update of the apartment after he has moved in.

Successful People

The most successful people are not necessarily the most popular. Sometimes, decisions has to be made. Some decisions are not popular because they will affect some people. Do you give up on those decisions then, or do you go ahead with your decisions knowing that that is the only way to achieve success? Sometimes, to be successful, you have to forge ahead, even if it means stepping on some toes along the way. If you give up on your decisions every time there is an objection, you will never be successful.

The successful person is not only goal-oriented; he has a definite plan and a burning desire to match. He chooses the right goal to pursue in the first place. If you want a certain type of fruit, you must choose to climb the right tree. Otherwise, you will never be successful. You must like what you are doing. You must enjoy your work, and be passionate about your work. When you enjoy what you do, you will put in more hours. You will work harder than anyone else, and that is how success is achieved.

Successful people do what unsuccessful people are not willing to do. There has to be some sort of sacrifice, if you want to succeed. You have to dare to take risk. You have to be prepared that you might fail and lose everything.

Sometimes, a person succeed because he has failed many times, and he was able to cash in on his failures. He learned the mistakes and he gained experience from his failures. Success comes when you simply refuse to give up, with goals so strong that obstacles, failure, and loss only act as motivation.

Have a look at these quotes. Learn what you must do to achieve success.

The predominant quality of successful people is optimism … your level of optimism is the very best predictor of how happy, healthy, wealthy, and long-lived you will be. - Brian Tracy

The man who has the largest capacity for work and thought is the man who is bound to succeed. - Henry Ford

The man who succeeds must always in mind, or imagination live, move, think, and act as if he had gained that success, or he never will gain it. - Prentice Mulford

The successful man is one who had the chance and took it. - Roger Babson

The successful person makes a habit of doing what the failing person doesn’t like to do. - Thomas Edison

Every person falls down at some point. Successful people choose to get back up. - Dave Ramsey

The successful man is the one who finds out what is the matter with his business before his competitors do. - Roy L. Smith

Successful people are simply those with successful habits. - Brian Tracy

The heights by great men reached and kept were not attained in sudden flight, but they, while their companions slept, were toiling upwards in the night. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Most of the successful people I’ve known are the ones who do more listening than talking. - Bernard Baruch

All About You

Of all the people that you need to be kind to, you are most probably least kind to yourself. You should go easy on yourself. Everyone needs a strong sense of self. It is our base of operations for everything that we do in life.

Whatever you do today, let it be enough. Just do the best that you can with what you have, with what you know. As long as you did your best, you should be happy and contented.

No matter what you do, someone will always talk about you. Someone will always question your judgment. Someone will always doubt you. So just smile, and make the choice you can live with.

Have faith in yourself. Never think that you are not good enough. Never think that what you have to offer is insignificant. There will always be someone out there who wish that they were you, that they have your confidence, and talents.

You are part of a puzzle in someone's life. You may never know where you fit. But, someone's life may never be complete without you in it. - Bonnie Arbor

Don’t take anything personally. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own drama. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering. - Unknown

Consult not your fears but your hopes and your dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible for you to do. - Pope John XXIII

Stop trying so hard to make others like you. You weren’t designed to fit a mold that someone else has made for you. - Elle Sommer

Trust yourself. You’ve survived a lot, and you’ll survive whatever is coming. - Robert Tew

Ever loved someone so much, you would do anything for them? Yeah, well, make that someone yourself and do whatever the hell you want. - Harvey Specter

Don’t compare yourself with anyone in this world. If you do so, you are insulting yourself. - Bill Gates

It's what no one knows about you that allows you to know yourself. - Don Delillo

If something doesn't go your way, it's probably because you didn't work that hard at it. - Chris Simms

If you are afraid of something, you give it power over you. - Moroccan Proverb

Dealing With Anger

No matter how sweet our temperament and nature is, we still get angry once in a while – at things, at people, at situations, at ourselves,…etc. That is only natural because we, humans are emotional beings after all. However, it is important to keep your cool, and keep your mouth shut, when you are teeming with anger. This way, you will not do, or say anything you will regret later. It is easy to lash out, when somebody, or something gets your goat, but the damage is usually quite irreparable.

Anger is a negative energy. Being angry, and harbouring all the negative energies is not beneficial to anyone, least of all to ourselves. Once we know how these destructive emotions affect our health, and our well-being, we should make an effort to curb our anger. We should remind ourselves constantly that our peace of mind is more important than anything else. Nothing is worth our getting angry.

So, what could possibly cause us to be angry, and to go off the deep end. Usually, it’s either situations, or people. I would say people are the main cause of our getting angry – people, and the annoying things they do and/or say. Sometimes, even their presence, their being around can annoy the hell out of us.

Let’s have a look at why we are angry and how we can overcome the situation.

When things don’t go according to our expectations.

Sometimes, unexpected situations arise to turn our best laid plans topsy turvy, causing us inconvenience and discomfort. While this is annoying, we should deal with it maturely. We have to accept that sometimes, things don’t go according to plan, and inconvenient as it is, that is life. These things happen. All we need to do is have a change of plans, and move on. Who knows, our day might end up better, or more fruitful for it. Be positive. And if it didn’t, at least we did something different.

Angry with People

There are nasty, annoying, and awful people everywhere. Sometimes, it is the things they say, sometimes, it is the things they do. Somehow, they just get on your nerves. People are who they are, and they can’t help it. Accept them for who they are, and let them be. There is nothing we can do about them, except to acknowledge that such people exist. We don’t have to be their friends.

We can go a step further, and try to understand why they are who they are. Maybe life hasn’t been kind to them, maybe they were not properly educated… there could be a host of reasons. If you can adopt such a mindset, you will empathise and feel sorry for them. You can’t be angry with someone when you feel sorry for them.

Angry with Criticisms

When we hear negative criticisms about us, we become angry very quickly. Our pride is hurt. We feel indignant that someone has the audacity to say negative things about us.

However, the fact is there is no need for us to get angry. We should in fact thank people for their criticisms. It is through criticisms that we see where we have gone wrong, and improve ourselves. And if the criticisms are baseless, we should just ignore them. There is no need to be angry at something that is untrue. The uncalled for criticisms reflect on the lack of taste, or knowledge of the critic, and not on us.

Angry with Ourselves

Sometimes, we lash out when we are angry. We took our anger out on things, and/or people. Sometimes, we damage things, or hurt people, sometimes, innocent people who have nothing to do with our anger. They just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time, and we simply lashed out because we need to vent our anger.

When we have cooled down, and realized what we have done, we are angry again, this time, with ourselves for losing control of ourselves. This should remind us, not to lash out blindly, but to keep a cool head. Otherwise, we would be angry twice, and life is too short to be living from one moment of anger to the next.

Besides, it is easy to forgive and get over our anger with situations, or other people, but it will take a long time to get over the anger with yourself.

At the end of the day, it is us who loses control over ourselves and us responding to stimulus that make us angry. If we can only take a deep breath, and look at things objectively, we will find that there is no need, nor reason for us to be angry.

When a situation arises, ask yourself, "Can I do something about it?" If you can, then there is no need to be angry, because you can rectify the situation. And if you can't doing anything about it, then there is no point being angry because nothing can be done. Accept the situation, and move on.

The critical thing here is to not lash out immediately. That is why, it is suggested that when you are angry, you should count to ten before responding. And when you are very angry? Count to one hundred!

A Walk Along the Promenade

Walking is a year-round activity, and need not be confined to the dry summer months, for there is as much beauty to be found in the countryside in the leafless months of winter as in vibrant spring and the golden days of autumn. - Kev Reynolds

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Some friends and I were out and about one day, when we decided to take a walk along the promenade. It was late afternoon, early evening time. Here are some pictures from the walk.

The bottom left white building that looks like part of the extensions have been 'cut off', is the Maritime Art Museum. The buildings in the background with the ship-like feature on the top is the Marina Bay Sands Casino.

This is the business district in the background.

This is the Theatre by the Bay.

The statue with the head of a lion and the body of a fish is the Merlion. This is a popular tourist spot. If you have been to Singapore, you will have a photo of the Merlion, or a photo with the Merlion in the background.

The Merlion is the official mascot of Singapore, depicted as a mythical creature with a lion's head and the body of a fish. Being of prominent symbolic nature to Singapore and Singaporeans in general, it is widely used to represent both the city state and its people in sports teams, advertising, branding, tourism and as a national personification. - Wikipedia

I was trying to get a couple of shots of the sunset, but was not very successful. I was a bit too late.

The sun has set and the lights are coming on. The reflection onto the facade of the buildings gave them a golden shine. I like this picture very much, although it didn't do justice to the actual scene.

Life's Little Lessons

There will always be days when we feel out of sorts – days when our biorhythms are a bit on the low side. During such times, all we need is a little lift – a kind word, or a word of encouragement. I have found that reading quotes during such moments helped. It gave me an emotional, and ‘spiritual high’, lifting my spirits immediately. The next time you are feeling down, or depressed, give it a try. Go to any quotes site and spend a few minutes going through the motivational and inspirational quotes. You will find your spirits uplifted immediately.

Meanwhile, here are some quotes to give your spirits a lift – if you are in need of one now.

You must learn to walk to the edge of the light, and perhaps a few steps into the darkness, and you will find that the light will appear and move ahead of you. - Harold B. Lee

I prefer to be true to myself, even at the hazard of incurring the ridicule of others, rather than to be false, and to incur my own abhorrence. - Frederick Douglass

If we are facing in the right direction, all we have to do is keep on walking. - Unknown

There is no greater delight than to be conscious of sincerity on self-examination. - Mencius

Prejudice, which sees what it pleases, cannot see what is plain. - Aubrey T. de Vere

If two men on the same job agree all the time, then one is useless. If they disagree all the time, then both are useless. - Darryl Francis Zanuck

The young do not know enough to be prudent, and therefore they attempt the impossible, and achieve it, generation after generation. - Pearl S. Buck

Not all those who know their minds know their hearts as well. - Duc de La Rochefoucauld

It takes both the sun and the rain to make a beautiful rainbow. - Unknown

There is always hope when people are forced to listen to both sides. - John Stuart Mill

A weed is a plant whose virtues have not yet been discovered. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words. - Robert Frost

Living

There is more to life than just thinking there is more to life. We have to live our lives. It is in living our lives to the fullest, that we get the most out of life.

It is not the length of your life that matters most - the width, and depth of your life matters more. Always remember, it is not the quantity of your years, but the quality of your years that count. They reflect how well you lived.

Our life’s journey is uniquely our own. No two individuals have the same destiny. People might travel with us on part of the journey, but ultimately, they have their own destination, and we have to travel on, on our own.

There is no need to compare. Life is not about being better than someone else. It is about allowing yourself to grow to your fullest potential, to live life you know how, to the fullest.

The person who makes a success of living is the one who sees his goal steadily and aims for it unswervingly. - Cecil B. DeMille

Live one day at a time emphasizing ethics rather than rules. - Wayne Dyer

The principles of living greatly include the capacity to face trouble with courage, disappointment with cheerfulness, and trial with humility. - Thomas S. Monson

We must look for ways to be an active force in our own lives. We must take charge of our own destinies, design a life of substance and truly begin to live our dreams. - Les Brown

Yes! live life with every fibre of one's being, surrender oneself to it, with no thoughts of rebellion, without deluding oneself that one can improve it and render it painless. - Emile Zola

Life must be lived with courage, with climbing and risks, else there is no happiness, no hope, no true success, no future. - Jennette Lee

Living is a constant process of deciding what we are going to do. - Jose Ortega Gasset

Living is a form of not being sure, not knowing what next or how. We guess. We may be wrong, but we take leap after leap in the dark. - Agnes de Mille

Live life to the fullest, and focus on the positive. - Matt Cameron

Bliss is achieved when you make a commitment to live the life which represents the true spirit that is you. - Sherri Bishop

The Hibiscus Flower

Don’t ask me why, but I have always thought of the hibiscus flower as a humble flower. Of course, I couldn’t be more wrong. The Hibiscus flower is anything but humble, as you will see by the end of the post. It is actually the national flower of Haiti, South Korea and neighbouring Malaysia.

According to Wikipedia, Hibiscus is a genus of flowering plants in the mallow family Malvaceae. The genus is quite large, comprising several hundred species that are native to warm temperate, tropical, and semi-tropical regions throughout the world.

Apart from being a beautiful flower, there are apparently many health benefit of hibiscus. There is hibiscus tea, known for its red colour, tart flavour, and vitamin C content. And the petals can also be used to prepare a cold beverage by first steeping the petals in hot water until the colors are leached from the petals, then adding lime juice, sugar or honey, and finally water and ice cubes.

Besides that, dried hibiscus is also edible, and a delicacy in Mexico. It can also be candied and used as a garnish, usually for desserts.

It is also said that the Hibiscus cannabinus is extensively used in paper-making. And the inner bark of the sea hibiscus (hibiscus tiliaceus) is used for making rope.

As you can see, the hibiscus is anything but humble.

The hibiscus is very hardy, and it is easy to grow. Cut off a section of a branch, stick it in the soil and give it lots of water and it will reward you with many years of lovely flowers. There are many colours of hibiscus flower. Red is the more common one. There are also white, pink, yellow and orangey colours.

In my younger days, the ‘Hibiscus rosa-sinensis’ flower is the most commonly seen in the neighbourhood. I guess it is because they are hardy and easy to grow. Hibiscus is a perennial and flowers through the year.

The following are some varieties of hibiscus in Singapore.

A hibiscus bush or shrub.

This is a different variety of hibiscus, a nice one too.

This looks like another variety of Hibiscus, but I can't be sure. The leaves look a bit different. Anyone knows? Please drop a comment, if you do.