Humorous Quips

Quips – a witty or funny observation or response, usually made on the spur of the moment, or it could be a clever, usually taunting remark.

The following quips are funny, and at the same time, there is truth in them. Maybe that is why they make us laugh – because we are able to see the humour, and relate to what’s being said. Sometimes, we find it funny because we are caught out, the quip took us by surprise.

I hope there will be at least a few in this collection that bring on a smile. Remember them and go make your friends laugh.

I reckon being ill as one of the great pleasures of life, provided one is not too ill and is not obliged to work till one is better. - Samuel Butler

The two most abundant things in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. - Harlan Ellison

There are many who dare not kill themselves for fear of what the neighbours will say. - Cyril Connolly

Food for thought gives some folks indigestion. - Ken Alstad

A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it’s the stupid ones who need advice. - Bill Cosby

Accept the fact that some days you’re the pigeon, and some days you’re the statue! - Unknown

Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. - John Ortberg Jr

It’s all right to hold a conversation, but you should let go of it now and then. - Richard Armour

Women diet to retain their girlish figures for their boyish husbands. - Evan Esar

A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you’ve been taking. - Earl Wilson

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Dahlias Close Up

“Flowers have a mysterious and subtle influence upon the feelings, not unlike some strains of music. They relax the tenseness of the mind. They dissolve its rigor.” - Henry Ward Beecher

Some photos of the gorgeous dahlias close-up. Big, colourful and vibrant blooms. Absolutely stunning! These were taken in the flower dome in the Gardens by the Bay. In the Flower Dome, it is eternal spring. Flowers bloom all year round.

Dahlias are perennial plants with tuberous roots, and are one of 32,000 species from the Asteraceae family. Dahlias not only come in a wide range of colours, they also have a great variety of flower forms. “To photograph truthfully and effectively is to see beneath the surfaces and record the qualities of nature and humanity which live, or are latent in all things.” - Ansel Adams

You can click on the picture for a better view.

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Dim Sum – "Yum Cha"

Dim sum is a Cantonese term referring to a variety of small Chinese dishes, that are served in restaurants for brunch or tea. It's a light meal of small, savoury or sweet dishes like dumplings, and pastries commonly enjoyed with tea. However, nowadays, people also use the term to mean a light snack.

The practice of having tea with dim sum evolved into the modern "yum cha", which literally means ‘drink tea’. Tea helps in food digestion and also cancels off the fats – or so it is believed. Anyhow, ‘yum cha’ is an occasion to socialise and catch up with each other, to share information and news – or just to gossip among friends.

Dim sum restaurants typically have a wide variety of dishes. Traditionally, they have staff going around the restaurant with dim sum dishes on carts. As they approach, you order what you need from them. Some restaurants still do that here, but most have the dim sum items listed on menus and you order from the menu.

Most dim sum dishes are made of seafood, meats, or vegetables wrapped in dough or thin wrappings and steamed, deep-fried, or pan-fried. Other dishes are steamed green vegetables, stuffed eggplant, stuffed green peppers, roasted meats, congee and soups. Nowadays, most Chinese restaurants have a small section of dim sum items on their regular menus. Customers can order dim sum as a side dish to go with their meals.

I am not a big fan of dim sum dishes. I find them too rich and filling. However, I do enjoy the occasional meal of dim sum. Recently, some friends suggested we go for dim sum. I went along gladly since it has been a while since I had dim sum.

We went to the ‘Peach Garden’ Chinese restaurant. It is one of those upper mid-end kinds of restaurants – if you know what I mean. The food was okay. Typical dim sum fare.

Dim sum dishes are not served together. They are served as and when they are ready. Normally, people would start off with a few dishes, and order more as they go along. This way, the food will be hot and the table would not be cluttered.

All these and more for a group of five. It was too much food. Someone in the group over-ordered. It was a good lunch, catching up with friends I haven’t seen for a long time while slowly going through the dishes.

You can click on the picture for a better view.

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Paraprosdokians

“A paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect, sometimes producing an anti-climax. For this reason, it is extremely popular among comedians and satirists.” - Wikipedia

Enjoy today’s selection of Paraprosdokians. May your days be filled with laughter.

Did you know on the canary Islands? There is not one canary? And on the virgin isles? Same thing, not one canary there either! - Unknown

The older I get, the more I regret all the people I’ve lost over the years. Maybe being a trail guide wasn’t such a great idea after all. - Unknown

When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn’t work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me. - Emo Philips

I have no colour prejudices nor caste prejudices nor creed prejudices. All I care to know is that a man is a human being, and that is enough for me; he can’t be any worse. - Mark Twain

Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, owing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about. - Rodney Dangerfield

Never criticize a man until you’ve run a mile in his shoes. That way, if he doesn’t like what you have to say, it’ll be OK because you’ll be a mile away and you’ll have his shoes. - Robin Evans

I make it a policy to try never to make a complete idiot of myself twice in the same way. After all, there’s always all kinds of new ways to make a complete idiot of myself. Why repeat the old ones? - Margot Dalton

People are always asking couples whose marriage has endured at least a quarter of a century for their secret for success. Actually, it’s no secret at all. I am a forgiving woman. Long ago, I forgave my husband for not being Paul Newman. - Erma Bombeck

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Flowers

“Just living is not enough. One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower.” - Hans Christian Anderson

Cheeses flower

Malva sylvestris is a species of the mallow genus Malva. They are also known as common mallow, cheeses, high mallow and tall mallow.

Common mallow is a herbaceous perennial. They have showy flowers of bright reddish-purple with dark stripes. They are often grown as an ornamental plant for its attractive flowers, produced for a long period through the summer. There are numerous cultivars and they grow freely in meadows, hedgerows and in fallow fields.

Allium Stipitatum

Allium stipitatum, also known as Persian shallot, is an Asian species of onion native to central and southwestern Asia.

Allium stipitatum grows from bulbs. Flowers are borne on stems and arranged in an umbel (a structure where the individual flowers are attached to a central point). Individual flowers, of which there are many, are a typical allium shape.

Allium stipitatum is used as a medicinal plant in Central Asia. Extracts of the bulbs of the plant, which showed activity against mycobacterium tuberculosis, were found to contain several pyridine-N-oxide derivatives.

All the above information are from Wikipedia.

You can click on the picture for a better view.

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Hawker Centers

term ‘hawker’ refers to a person who informally sells something in public. A hawker center is where there are many hawkers selling, in this case, different varieties of affordable meals in a complex. Hawker centers are conveniently located at the heart of housing estates, usually with adjoining wet markets. Hawkers rent the stalls from the governing authority at a subsidised rate. This allows them to keep their prices affordable to the public.

Hawker centers differ from food-courts in that food-courts are indoors and air-conditioned. They are found mainly in shopping malls and other commercial venues. Like the hawker centers, food-courts sell a variety of different foods Customers typically pay a bit more for a meal there than for a similar meal at the hawker centres for the air-conditioned comfort.

Dining at a hawker centre is a quintessentially Singaporean experience,  allowing one to experience a wide variety of multicultural food and drinks at affordable prices. It is said approximately 80 percent of Singaporeans eat at hawker centres more than once a week. This, when one-third of Singaporeans eat out more than seven times weekly. This is not all that surprising. For authentic local food and flavours, you are more likely to find them at the hawker stalls.

Besides the authentic food and flavours, and the affordable prices, it is the convenience. The hawker center starts operation in the morning and closes late in the evening. For those near tourists areas, some close in the early morning hours. In this way, one can go to the hawker center at any time of the day to have something to eat. You can have breakfast, lunch, dinner and supper at the hawker center because different stalls cater to different crowds.

Hawker Centers. Many stalls selling local favourite foods.

You can have a light snack between meals, or …

… you can have a full meal.

A sugar cane drink. One of my favourite drinks.

In 2016, two Singaporean food stalls, both located in hawker centres, became the first food vendors to be awarded a Michelin Star for excellent food.

In 2019, Singapore submitted its nomination to inscribe its hawker culture on the UNESCO Representative List of the Intangible Cultural Heritage of Humanity. Inscription was announced on 16 December 2020, when UNESCO described the hawker centre as "‘community dining rooms’ where people from diverse backgrounds gather and share the experience of dining over breakfast, lunch and dinner." - Wikipedia

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Humorous Wit

Aphorisms and quotes that are witty and humorous have an advantage. They make us smile and are therefore more easily remembered.

Take a look at today’s selection of witty aphorisms. They are funny, witty, and at the same time, there is quite a bit of truth in some of them. Remember the ones you like, and go impress your friends with your wit and humour. You will be very popular. We all like a witty and humorous person.

Have a great week ahead and may your days be filled with laughter.

Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold – but so does a hard-boiled egg. - Unknown

Curiosity is the very basis of education and if you tell me that curiosity killed the cat, I say the cat died nobly. - Arnold Edinborough

At no time is freedom of speech more precious than when a man hits his thumb with a hammer. - Marshall Lumsden

Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark; professionals built the Titanic! - Unknown

There is always room for improvement. It is the biggest room in the house. - Unknown

Autobiography is probably the most respectable form of lying. - Humphrey Carpenter

Barring that natural expression of villainy which we all have, the man looked honest enough. - Mark Twain

A tavern is a place where madness is sold by the bottle. - Jonathan Swift

The big shots are only the little shots who keep shooting. - Christopher Morley

Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their colour. Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense, and choosing your friends by their colour is unthinkable. - Unknown

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Lilium Philadelphicum

Lilium philadelphicum, also known as the wood lily, flame lily, Philadelphia lily, prairie lily, or western red lily, is a perennial species of lily native to North America. – Wikipedia

Lilium is a genus of herbaceous flowering plants growing from bulbs, all with large prominent flowers. They are the true lilies. Many other plants have "lily" in their common names, but do not belong to the same genus and are therefore not true lilies.

There are many species, and cultivated varieties of lilies. Most lilies grow from bulbs, which in some species develop into a rhizome, carrying small bulbs. They thrive best in partial shades, with loose, well-drained soil. Tubers allow the plants to store water and nutrients. Hence, if you give them too much water, the roots will riot.

Lilies can be grown indoors and outdoors. The blooms can last up to two weeks. This makes them very suitable, and popular for bouquets.

In some cultures, the bulbs of the lily are gathered for food and medicine. The bulbs, once cooked, can be applied to sores, bruises, swellings and wounds. In Chinese medicine, the lily plant is said to be beneficial to our hearts and lungs. The flowers are dried and used in cooking stews or soups. The healing properties of lily include “moisturizing the lungs, relieving cough from lung dryness, clears heart-fire and tranquilize the mind.

These brightly coloured, big and beautiful lilies are from the Flower Dome.

You can click on the picture for a better view.

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