- Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient.
- Better be pissed off than pissed on.
- Beauty is skin deep; ugly goes right to the bone.
- Lady who go camping must beware of evil intent.
- Squirrel who runs up woman’s leg will not find nuts.
- He who run behind bus gets exhausted.
- Man who leap off cliff jump to conclusion.
- Man with tight trousers is pressing his luck.
- It is better to be looked over than overlooked.
- On the other hand, you have different fingers.
- Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
- Those who live by the sword, get shot by those who do not.
- Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
- He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
- Two wrongs not make a right - Three lefts do.
- Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
- Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes soon burn out!
- People who want to share their religious views with you never want you to share yours with them.
- Do not sweat the petty things and do not pet the sweaty things.
- A day without sunshine is like, well, night.
- You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
- Just remember...if the world did not suck, we would all fall off.
- Latest survey shows that three out of four people make up seventy five percent of the world’s population.
- A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
- Everybody lies, but it does not matter since nobody listens.
- Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
- One should love animals. They are so tasty.
- A hard-on does not count as personal growth.
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