Monday, 19 June 2017

Humorous Quotes

I must have a prodigious amount of mind; it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up! - Mark Twain

I've finally reached the age where my Wild Oats have turned into All-Bran! - Tom Wilson

It's terribly hard to be married ... harder than anything else. I think you have to be an angel. - August Strindberg

I’m gonna go take a hot shower. It’s like a normal shower, but with me in it. - Unknown

In my dream, I was drowning my sorrows, but my sorrows they’d learned to swim. - U2

I’m not mean, I just give people a good reason to hate me. - Haresh Daswani

I’m so ugly my father carries around a picture of the kid who came with his wallet. - Rodney Dangerfield

I’ve given my memoirs far more thought than any of my marriages. You can’t divorce a book. - Gloria Swanson

I’ve never had a problem with drugs. I’ve had problems with the police. - Keith Richards

I'm always diplomatic when heavily outnumbered by armed strangers. - S. M. Stirling

I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal. - Groucho Marx

The trouble ain’t that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain’t distributed right. - Mark Twain

Click Here for more humorous quotes, or Here for the book ‘Of Wit ‘n’ Humour’

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