Thursday, 19 March 2009

Forgive And Forget

Sometimes, when we sit back and retrospect, we will realize that there are many occasions when a little forgiveness on our part will have made a lot of difference.

Forgiveness for others as well as for ourselves; We must exonerate ourselves for the unique decisions we’ve made, for the foolish things we’ve said, for the times we’ve let ourselves down, and for the times we’ve let our friends down.

Having past the stage where the fury and anger had long subsided and where our sanity is not being tempered by the irrational and unreasonable haste and actions, we must stop torturing ourselves for our lack of wisdom when we needed it; for our cautiousness when we should have been bold and for our boldness when we should have been cautious.

We must forgive the times when we’ve lost our temper over trifles, failed to stand up for our rights when we should have, stepped on other people’s toes with our insensitive remarks, given in to the inconsiderate egotism that is so much a part of human nature. We must erase our shame over the petty failures or prejudices in our life. We must recognize that there is great sweetness in forgiveness, for it is the balm for the scars of life. Without it there is no quiet room in our mind to escape to for peace; there is only a room jangling with tension.

We must also realize that no one can live creatively if he cannot forgive his own blunders and imperfections. We must understand that as human beings, we are not without faults nor are we perfect; we must see our successes and cherish them as we must see our faults too and forgive them.

It is only by this pragmatic and sober attitude in forgiving ourselves that we can forgive others. No matter who we are, we have been hurt at one time or another. But we must stop holding grudges. It is evident that too many people waste their time obsessed with hatred for those who have hurt them.

We must learn to forgive a parent, a friend or a loved one, for the errors in the past. We must forgive the hurt they have caused us. Forgiveness is part of a process that begins with a hurt and ends, as its final and long-range goal, with the event of reconciliation. It works only when we become aware of the depths and causes of the anger burning in us so that we can forgive whole-heartedly and ensure an enduring peace.

There is usually a pause between the hurt and the time when trust and love can take root again. The ability to forgive can’t be rushed. We owe it to each other to offer time to confront our hurts, to face our wounds head-on, to vent our emotions. Only then can real healing begin.

In the end, all forgivers do the same thing; they restore self-worth to the offender; they cancel a debt; they experience such peace that they lose the urge to retaliate, and live as freer persons, unshackled by the weight of the hurt.

Ultimately, we must forget all these trivialities by living in the present – in TODAY

“To err is human. To forgive divine.”

- Author Unknown 

No comments: