When seeking the advice of a distinguished author, a young writer once said, “Mr. Maugham, I’ve just written a novel, but I haven’t been able to come up with a suitable title. You seem to have a such a knack for titles, sir, ‘Cakes and Ale,’ ‘The Razor’s Edge.’ I wonder if you would read my novel and help me.”
“Don’t need to read your novel,” said Maugham. “Are there drums in it?”
“No, it’s not that sort of story. You see, it deals with the alienation of …”
“Are there any bugles in it?”
“No, sir.”
“Call it, ‘No Drums, No Bugles.’”
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