Sunday, 27 December 2009

Humorous Signs

On the trucks of a local plumbing company in: 
Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.

On a fence: 
Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive.

At the electric company: 
We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don’t, you will be.

Outside a photographer’s studio:
Out to lunch; if not back by five, out for dinner also.

On motorway garage:
Please do not smoke near our petrol pumps. Your life may not be worth much but our petrol is.

At a farm gate:
Beware! I shoot every tenth trespasser and the ninth one has just left.

Notice in a field:
The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.

On an electrician’s truck: 
Let us remove your shorts.

Sign On A Famous Beauty Parlor Window:
Don't Whistle At The Girls Going Out From Here. She May Be Your Grandmother!

Sign At A Barber's Saloon:
We Need Your Heads To Run Our Business.

Advertisement In A Long Island Shop:
Guitar, for sale ... Cheap ... no strings attached.

Ad In Hospital Waiting Room:
Smoking Helps You Lose Weight ... One Lung At A Time!

Sign In A Bar:
'Those Of You Who Are Drinking To Forget, Please Pay In Advance.'

Sign In Driving School:
If Your Wife Wants To Learn To Drive, Don't Stand In Her Way.

A Traffic Slogan:
Don't Let Your Kids Drive If They are Not Old Enough Or Else They Will Never Be.

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