Monday, 3 November 2014

Humorous Quotes

Quotes which are funny, ironical, some of which are also profoundly true.

James Joyce - an essentially private man who wished his total indifference to public notice to be universally recognized. - Tom Stoppard

Journalism largely consists of saying "Lord Jones is Dead" to people who never knew that Lord Jones was alive. - Gilbert K. Chesterton 

Journalist say a thing that they know isn’t true, in the hope that if they keep on saying it long enough it will be true. - Arnold Bennett

Joy, temperance, and repose, slam the door on the doctor’s nose. - Henry Wadworth Longfellow

Just because nobody complains doesn’t mean all parachutes are perfect. - Benny Hill

Keep breathing. - Sophie Tucker, 80 when asked the secret of longevity

Keep thy smooth words and juggling homilies for those who know thee not. - Lord Bryon

Laziness travels so slowly that poverty soon overtakes him. - Benjamin Franklin

Let us have wine and women, mirth and laughter. Sermons and soda water the day after. - Lord G. G. Bryon

Let us not be too particular; it is better to have old second-hand diamonds than none at all. - Mark Twain

Life has a way of setting things in order and leaving them be. Very tidy, is life. - Jean Anouilh

Life is all about finding the people who are your kind of crazy. - Unknown

Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon. - Woody Allen 

Life is not so bad if you have plenty of luck, a good physique, and not too much imagination. - Christopher Isherwood

Life is short, but its long enough to ruin any man who wants to be ruined. - Josh Billings 

No comments: