Men marry women with the hope they will never
change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are
both disappointed. - Albert Einstein
Scientists have proven beyond a shadow of a
doubt that there is life after death – though they say it's virtually
impossible to get decent Chinese food. - David
Letterman
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass
all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Unknown
Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back.
Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time ... they're gone. - Lenny Bruce
It is easier to make a glass tube pliable
than to convince an obstinate woman she is in fault. - William Scott Downey
If you can't answer a man's argument, all is
not lost; you can still call him vile names. - Elbert Hubbard
Not a shred of evidence exists in favour of
the idea that life is serious. - Brendan
Gill
Please Lord, let me prove that winning the
lottery won't spoil me. - Unknown
I live in a neighbourhood so bad that you can
get shot while getting shot. - Chris Rock
Age is of no importance unless you're a
cheese. - Billie Burke
If you cannot be a poet, be the poem. - David Carradine
I never trust a man who doesn’t drink. - John Wayne
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