Monday, 8 August 2011

Dealing With Anger

No matter how sweet our temperament and nature is, we still get angry once in a while – at things, at people, at situations …etc. That is only natural because we are human beings after all. 

The following talks about dealing with angers. Maybe you will bear in mind the following points when you are feeling angry, or dealing with anger in the future.

1. Dealing with criticism from other people -
When someone says the truth, we can acknowledge our faults and mistakes, just as we acknowledge having a nose on our face. There is no need to get angry. On the other hand, if someone blames us for something we didn't do, it is as if he/she said that we have horns on our heads. There is no reason to be angry at something untrue.

2. Dealing with situations -
Ask ourselves, "Can I do something about it?"
If we can, then anger is out of place because we can improve the situation. If we can't change the situation, anger is useless because nothing can be done.

3. Dealing with disagreement -
Examine how we got involved in the situation - What actions did we do recently to prompt the disagreement? Examining this helps us to understand why the other person is upset.

4. Dealing with the enemy -
Remember the kindness of the enemy. Firstly, he/she points out our mistakes so that we can correct them and improve our character. Secondly, she gives us the opportunity to practise patience. Thus the enemy is kinder to us than our friends.
Recognise that the other person's unhappiness and confusion are making him harm us. Since we know what it is like to be unhappy, we can empathise with him. Thus he becomes the object of our compassion and not the object of our anger.

5. Dealing with our selfish attitude -
Sometimes we get angry when things suddenly crop up and spoil our plans or put us in discomfort. But this anger is actually due to our selfish attitude that all things must go our way. If we can recognise this and change our attitude or way of thinking, we will be able to take things into our stride and curb anger.

6. Dealing with people that irritates us -
Ask ourselves, "Is it the person's nature to act like this?" If it is, then there's no reason to be angry, for it will be like getting annoyed with fire for burning. If it isn't, again anger is unrealistic, for it will be like getting angry at the sky for having clouds in it.

7. Examine the disadvantages of anger and grudge-holding -
Once we know and recognise the disadvantages of these destructive emotions that will affect our health and our lives, we will have the strength and energy to battle and dissolve anger as nobody will want their lives to be unhappy.

- Source Unknown

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