Monday, 5 May 2014

Humorous Quotes

Quotes which are funny, ironic, as well as simply, or profoundly true.

A politician needs the ability to foretell what is going to happen tomorrow, next week, next month, and next year. And to have the ability afterwards to explain why it didn't happen. - Unknown

A process which led from the amoeba to man appeared to philosophers to be obviously progress - though whether the amoeba would agree with this opinion is not known. - Bertrand Russell

A promising young man should go into politics so that he can go on promising for the rest of his life. - Robert Byrne

A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing. - Joey Adams

A radical is a man with both feet firmly planted in the air. - Franklin Delano Roosevelt

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money. - W. C. Fields

A romance that ends in indifference has gone through a full course of development. - Unknown

A self-made man? Yes, and one who worships his creator. - William Cowper

A series of great opportunities, brilliantly disguised as insoluble problems. - John William Gardner

A small town is a place where there is little to see or do, but what you hear makes up for it. - Ivern Ball

A study of economics usually reveals that the best time to buy anything is last year. - Marty Allen

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. - Lana Turner

A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the word you first thought of. - Burt Bacharach

A tavern is a place where madness is sold by the bottle. - Jonathan Swift

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