Quotes which are funny, ironic, as well as
simply, or profoundly true.
Always borrow money from a
pessimist. He won’t expect it back. - Unknown
An intelligence test sometimes
shows a man how smart he would have been not to have taken it. - Laurence Peter
An onion can make people cry but
there’s never been a vegetable that can make people laugh. - Will Rogers
An optimist is
someone who goes after Moby Dick in a rowboat and takes the tartar sauce with
him. - Zig Ziglar
An optimist
stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make
sure the old year leaves. - Bill Vaughan
And behind every man who's a
failure there's a woman, too! - John Ruge
And the things
that come to those that wait may be the things left by those that got there
first. - Steven Tyler
Animals are such
agreeable friends – they ask no questions, they pass no criticisms. - George
Eliot
Anybody can be a heart specialist.
The only requirement is loving somebody. - Angie Papadakis
Anybody who believes that the way
to a man's heart is through his stomach flunked geography. - Robert Byrne
Anybody who
isn’t pulling his weight is probably pushing his luck. - Franklin P. Jones
Anybody who thinks talk is cheap
should get some legal advice.. - Franklin
P. Jones
Anybody who’s
walking on clouds is apt to be carried away. - Franklin P. Jones
Anyone who goes to see a
psychiatrist ought to have his head examined. - Samuel Goldwyn
Apparently there is nothing that
cannot happen today. - Mark Twain
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