Humorous Quotes

A new study found that women gain more weight after marriage, but men gain more weight after a divorce. Yeah, the divorce usually takes place after men point out that women gained more weight after marriage. - Jimmy Fallon

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party. - Ron White

The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there’s no law against whacking them around a bit. - Eric Porterfield

There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Writers fish for the right words like fishermen fish for, um, whatever those aquatic creatures with fins and gills are called. - Jarod Kintz

Laughter was the most terrible weapon: you can kill anything with laughter. - Yevgeny Zamyatin

Always wear cute pyjamas to bed, you’ll never know who you will meet in your dreams. - Joel Madden

I am constantly torn between killing myself and killing everyone around me. - David Levithan

The enemy of my enemy is my enemy's enemy. No more. No less. - Howard Taylor

Save a boyfriend for a rainy day – and another, in case it doesn’t rain. - Mae West

I love criticism just so long as it's unqualified praise. - Noel Coward

When in doubt, punt! - John Heisman

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Success

Successful people maintain a positive focus in life no matter what is going on around them. They stay focused on their past successes rather than their past failures, and on the next action steps they need to take to get them closer to the fulfilment of their goals rather than all the other distractions that life presents to them. - Jack Canfield

The great successful men of the world have used their imagination ... they think ahead and create their mental picture, and then go to work materializing that picture in all its details, filling in here, adding a little there, altering this a bit and that a bit, but steadily building, steadily building. - Robert Collier

The truth is, success often occurs for reasons we don’t expect, under circumstances over which we have little control and sometimes unrelated to our own efforts. There is only one other lesson that success should teach us: Be as amazed by your own success as your friends are. If you truly are, you stand the best chance to repeat it. - Harvey Mackay

Here is the prime condition of success: Concentrate your energy, thought and capital exclusively upon the business in which you are engaged. Having begun on one line, resolve to fight it out on that line, to lead in it, adopt every improvement, have the best machinery, and know the most about it. - Andrew Carnegie

Success is not a destination, but the road that you’re on. Being successful means that you’re working hard and walking your walk every day. You can only live your dream by working hard towards it. That’s living your dream. - Marlon Wayans

More on Success Here

Quote Worthy

The folly of mistaking a paradox for a discovery, a metaphor for a proof, a torrent of verbiage for a spring of capital truths, and oneself for an oracle, is inborn in us. - Paul Valéry

Some days you will be the light for others, and some days you will need some light from them. As long as there is light, there is hope, and there is a way. - Unknown

When you truly care for someone, their mistakes never change your feelings because it’s the mind that gets angry but the heart still cares. - Unknown

A wonderful fact to reflect upon, that every human creature is constituted to be that profound secret and mystery to every other. - Charles Dickens

What you see and hear depends a good deal on where you are standing; it also depends on what sort of person you are. - C. S. Lewis

If we cannot now end our differences, at least we can help make the world safe for diversity. - John F. Kennedy

After hard work, the biggest determinate is being in the right place at the right time. - Michael Bloomberg

The fly on the water buffalo's back thinks he is taller than the water buffalo. - Filipino Proverb

It’s by riding a bicycle that you learn the contours of a country best. - Ernest Hemingway

You will never find the right person, if you never let go of the wrong one. - Unknown

We never know which lives we influence, or when, or why. - Stephen King

The beginning is the most important part of any work. - Plato

More quotes Here
And the book Quote Worthy

Anti-Cancer Fruits

9 excellent anti-cancer fruits to include in your diet.

Read all about them here Anti-Cnacer Fruits

Food for Thought

One day, we all will depart on a journey free of cost. Don’t worry about seat reservation, it is confirmed. The flight is always on time. Our good deeds will be our luggage. Humanity will be our passport. Love will be our visa. Make sure we do our best to travel to Heaven in business class. - Unknown

Man is buffeted by circumstances so long as he believes himself to be the creature of outside conditions, but when he realizes that he is a creative power, and that he may command the hidden soil and seed of his being out of which his circumstance grow, he then becomes the rightful master of himself. - Unknown

As you begin to take action toward the fulfilment of your goals and dreams, you must realize that not every action will be perfect. Not every action will produce the desired result. Not every action will work. Making mistakes, getting it almost right, and experimenting to see what happens are all part of the process of eventually getting it right. - Jack Canfield

Developing excellent communication skills is absolutely essential to effective leadership. The leader must be able to share knowledge and ideas to transmit a sense of urgency and enthusiasm to others. If a leader can’t get a message across clearly and motivate others to act on it, then having a message doesn’t even matter. - Gilbert Amelio

Don’t wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what. Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful. - Mark Victor Hansen

More Food for Thought Here or Here for the book Food for Thought

Humorous Quotes

Allow me to offer my congratulations on the truly admirable skill you have shown in keeping clear of the mark. Not to have hit once in so many trials, argues the most splendid talents for missing. - Thomas De Quincey

What does it mean to be the best? It means you have to be better than the number two guy. But what gratification is there in that? He’s a loser – that’s why he’s number two. - Jarod Kintz

If animals could speak the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow, but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

I’m not waiting until my hair turns white to become patient and wise. Nope, I’m dyeing my hair tonight. - Jarod Kintz

A negative judgment gives you more satisfaction than praise, provided it smacks of jealousy. - Jean Baudrillard

So tell me, where shall I go? To the left, where nothing’s right? Or to the right, where nothings left? - Unknown

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die. - Mel Brooks

It’s 4:58 on Friday afternoon. Do you know where your margarita is? - Amy Neftzger

There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it. - Mindy Kaling

The computer saves man a lot of guesswork, but so does the bikini. - Evan Esar

When a thief kisses you, count your teeth. - Yiddish Proverb

It is better to be looked over than overlooked. - Mae West

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Life - Quotes

At this age, everything is changing. Day by day we don’t notice, but just look back over the past year and you will realise everything has. People you thought that were going to be there forever aren’t, and people you never imagined you’d be speaking to are now some of your closest friends. Life makes little sense, and the more we grow the less sense it will make. So make the most of now, before it all changes once again, because in the near future, all of this is only going to be memories. - Unknown

The purpose of life seems to be to acquaint a man with himself and whatever science or art or course of action he engages in reacts upon and illuminates the recesses of his own mind. Thus friends seem to be only mirrors to draw out and explain to us ourselves; and that which draws us nearer our fellow man, is, that the deep Heart in one, answers the deep Heart in another, – that we find we have (a common Nature) – one life which runs through all individuals, and which is indeed Divine. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The zest for life of those unusual men and women who make a great zealous success of living is due more often in good part to the craftiness and pertinacity with which they manage to overlook the misery of others. You can watch them watch life beat the stuffing out of the faces of their friends and acquaintances, although they themselves seem to outwit the dense delalys of social custom, the tedious tick-tock of bureaucratic obfuscation, accepting loss and age and change and disappointment without suffering punctures in their stomach lining. - Edward Hoagland

More on Life Here

And more in the book, The Mystery of Life

Quote Worthy

You can become blind by seeing each day as a similar one. Each day is a different one, each day brings a miracle of its own. It's just a matter of paying attention to this miracle. - Paulo Coelho

We are like the spider. We weave our life and then move along in it. We are like the dreamer who dreams and then lives in the dream. This is true for the entire universe. - The Upanishads

If you feel like giving up, give up on that feeling and give into the realization there are endless possibilities waiting to be discovered before you. - Tom Althouse

When you can’t control what’s happening, challenge yourself to control the way you respond to what’s happening. That’s where your power is. - Unknown

Don’t worry about the people who hurt or hate you, worry about the people who love you, because that’s where your happiness is. - Unknown

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind; the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

You do not need to always conceptualize, interpret or label everything that comes into your awareness. - Eckhart Tolle

We are shaped by our thoughts. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves. - Buddha

The problem with closed minded people, is that their mouth is always open. - Unknown

Pretending to be someone you're not is a waste of the person you are. - Kurt Cobain

If you hit every time the target’s too near. - Tom Hirshfield

At the end of the day, it is what it is. - Unknown

More quotes Here

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Trivia

Quotes by Experts, later proved terribly wrong.

I can’t guarantee the accuracy of all the points. :-)

It would appear that we have reached the limits of what is possible to achieve with computer technology, although one should be careful with such statements, as they tend to sound pretty silly in five years. - John von Neumann, computer inventor, 1949

Flight by machines heavier than air is impractical and insignificant, if not utterly impossible. - Simon Newcomb, astronomer, 1902

When the president does it, that means it is not illegal. - Richard Nixon, 1977

There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in their home. - Ken Olson, President of Digital Corporation, 1977

What use could this company make of an electrical toy? - William Orton, Western Union President, turning down Alexander Graham Bell’s offer to sell his telephone company for $100,000

Louis Pasteur’s theory of germs is a ridiculous fiction. - Pierre Pachet, Professor Physiology, Toulouse, 1872

Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons. - Popular Mechanics, 1949

The energy produced by the breaking down of the atom is a very poor kind of thing. Anyone who looks for a source of power in the transformation of the atom is talking moonshine. - Ernest Rutherford, 1936

I should say that no railway locomotive ought to exceed 40 miles per hour on the most favourable gradient, but on a curved line the speed ought not to exceed 24 or 25 miles per hour. - George Stephenson, 1841

Such startling announcements as these should be deprecated as being unworthy of science and mischievous to its true progress. - Sir William Siemens (on Edison’s announcement of light bulb), 1880

The abolishment of pain in surgery is a chimera. It is absurd to go on seeking it today. - Dr. Alfred Velpeau, surgeon professor, Paris Faculty of Medicine, 1837

Who the hell wants to hear actors talk? - Harry Warner (of Warner Bros), 1927

I think there is a world market for maybe five computers. - Thomas J. Watson Snr., IBM Chairman, 1943

We have reached the limits of what is possible with computers. - John Von Neumann, 1949

With regard to the electric light, much has been said for and against it, but I think I may say without contradiction that when the Paris Exhibition closes, electric light will close with it, and no more will be heard of it. - Erasmus Wilson, Oxford University professor, 1878

I must confess that my imagination, in spite even of spurring, refuses to see any sort of submarine doing anything but suffocating its crew and floundering at sea. - H. G. Wells, 1901

Space travel is utter bilge. - Dr. Richard van der Riet Woolley, Astronomer Royal, 1956

I confess that in 1901 I said to my brother Orville that man would not fly for fifty years. Two years later we ourselves made flights. This demonstration of my impotence as a prophet gave me such a shock that ever since I have distrusted myself and avoided all predictions. - Wilbur Wright, 1908

The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to better than a C, the idea must be feasible. - Yale professor, marking paper by Fred Smith, Federal Express founder, on business principles later used in FedEx

Video won’t be able to hold onto any market it captures after the first six months. People will soon get tired of staring at a plywood box every night. - Darryl F. Zanuck, 20th Century Fox, 1946

More Trivia Here

Food for Thought

Take action. Every story you’ve ever connected with, every leader you’ve ever admired, every puny little thing that you’ve ever accomplished is the result of taking action. You have a choice. You can either be a passive victim of circumstance or you can be the active hero of your own life. - Bradley Withford

A man’s ethical behaviour should be based effectually on sympathy, education, and social ties and needs; no religious basis is necessary. Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear of punishment and hope of reward after death. - Albert Einstein

Alas, everything that men say to one another is alike; the ideas they exchange are almost always the same, in their conversation. But inside all those isolated machines, what hidden recesses, what secret compartments! It is an entire world that each one carries within him, an unknown world that is born and dies in silence! What solitudes all these human bodies are! - Alfred de Musset

At first, the drudgery of mastering your craft is a prison – boring, slow, and with an awareness of how much time you’ll have to put in. But somewhere along your prison sentence, you come to see the time you put into your work not as dull and meager, but as meaningful – and you realize that your prison has become your palace, your place of escape. - Jarod Kintz

Develop and protect a moral sensibility and demonstrate the character to apply it. Dream big. Work hard. Think for yourself. Love everything you love, everyone you love, with all your might. And do so, please, with a sense of urgency, for every tick of the clock subtracts from fewer and fewer. - David McCullough Jr.

More Food for Thought Here or Here for the book Food for Thought

Humorous Quotes

Marriage is for woman the commonest mode of livelihood, and the total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution. - Bertrand Russell

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There’s no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. - Groucho Marx

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions? - Scott Adams

You can't always go by an expert opinion. A turkey, if you ask a turkey, should be stuffed with grasshoppers, grit and worms. - Unknown

I thought my vasectomy would keep my wife from getting pregnant but apparently it just changes the colour of the baby. - Unknown

What do I do when I see someone extremely gorgeous? I stare, I smile and when I get tire … I put the mirror down. - Gaurav Sindana

A new study found that people who are depressed have a greater risk of stroke. Well that should cheer them up. - Jay Leno

There is no cure for baldness; the bald-headed barber is the proof. - American Proverb

The alternative to a vacation is to stay home and tip every third person you see. - Unknown

Writing books is the closest men ever come to childbearing. - Norman Mailer

I like men who have a future and women who have a past. - Oscar Wilde

In politics stupidity is not a handicap. - Napoleon Bonaparte

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Happiness - Quotes

As long as we continue to think we will be happy in the future, we will never be happy in the moment, and that is the same as saying that we will never be happy. If we think that our lives will be better when we get that better job or retire, stay or go, gain or lose weight, or when our children grow and leave or come back, we are putting off the happiness that there is in today. - Aminu Kano

Human nature, at its best, had always been based on a deep heroic restlessness, on wanting something – something else, something more, whether it be true love or a glimpse just beyond the horizon. It was the promise of happiness, not the attainment of it, that had driven the entire engine, the folly and glory of who we are. - Will Ferguson

I am still determined to be cheerful and to be happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learnt, from experience, that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances. We carry the seeds of the one or the other about with us, in our minds, wheresoever we go. - Martha Washington

More on Happiness Here

Quote Worthy

What moves men of genius, or rather what inspires their work, is not new ideas, but their obsession with the idea that what has already been said is still not enough. - Eugene Delacroix

If someone treats you like crap, just remember that there is something wrong with them, not you. Normal people don’t go around destroying other human beings. - Unknown

There is a chill air surrounding those who are down in the world, and people are glad to get away from them, as from a cold room. - George Eliot

The first to apologize is the bravest. The first to forgive is the strongest. The first to forget is the happiest. - Unknown

Nobody’s a natural. You work hard to get good and then work to get better. It’s hard to stay on top. - Paul Coffey

A thing long expected takes the form of the unexpected when at last it comes. - Mark Twain

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard. - Winnie-the-Pooh

When virtues are pointed out first, flaws seem less insurmountable. - Judith Martin

One must learn to know oneself before knowing anything else. - Soren Kierkegaard

It doesn't matter what others are doing. It matters what you are doing. - Unknown

Instead of seeking new landscapes, develop new eyes. - Marcel Proust

The more you want, the more you stand to lose. - Aesop

More quotes Here

Definitions You Won’t See In The Dictionary

Etc.: end of Thinking Capacity. - Unknown

Family: a social unit where the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar

Future: that period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured. - Ambrose

Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another. - Ambrose Bierce

Heathen: a benighted creature who has the folly to worship something he can see and feel. - Ambrose Bierce

History: an account mostly false, of events mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools. - Ambrose Bierce

Imagination: a warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership. - Ambrose Bierce

Immortality: the condition of a dead man who doesn’t believe that he is dead. - H. L. Mencken

Jealousy: that dragon which slays love under the pretence of keeping it alive. - Henry Havelock Ellis

Laziness. unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree. - Ambrose Bierce

Leisure: fun taken seriously. - Mary Addink

Logic: the art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding. - Ambrose Bierce

Love: a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker. - Unknown

Food for Thought

A man can be as great as he wants to be. If you believe in yourself and have the courage, the determination, the dedication, the competitive drive and if you are willing to sacrifice the little things in life and pay the price for the things that are worthwhile, it can be done. - Anthony Robbins

Dreamers may like dreaming, inventors may like inventing, but not so many of them like the effort of putting their ideas into action. In fact the action part of the cycle involves more creativity and innovation than ever, perhaps even recreating yourself as a person of action. - Unknown

I always did something I was a little not ready to do. I think that’s how you grow. When there’s that moment of ‘Wow, I’m not really sure I can do this,’ and you push through those moments, that’s when you have a breakthrough. - Marissa Mayer

A man can never do anything at variance with his own nature. He carries within him the germ of his most exceptional action; and if we wise people make eminent fools of ourselves on any particular occasion, we must endure the legitimate conclusion that we carry a few grains of folly to our ounce of wisdom. - George Eliot

Clothing and makeup and hair and all of that so much indicates the kind of person you are inside and the person you are presenting on the outside. Sometimes they are in conflict, and sometimes they are the same. That psychology of the exterior informing the interior is just so interesting. - Tatiana Maslany

More Food for Thought Here

Humorous Quotes

I think the key indicator for wealth is not good grades, work ethic, or IQ. I believe it’s relationships. Ask yourself two questions: How many people do I know, and how much ransom money could I get for each one? - Jarod Kintz

When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished by how much he'd learned in seven years. - Mark Twain

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think. - Unknown

Talking to a drunk person was like talking to an extremely happy, severely brain-damaged three-year-old. - John Green

Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy’s pocket on an airplane and made a run for it. - Rodney Dangerfield

You can always make a loan at a bank if you can show sufficient evidence that you don't need it. - Evan Esar

Most people do not consider dawn to be an attractive experience – unless they are still up. - Ellen Goodman

Some are born weird, some achieve it, others have weirdness thrust upon them. - Dick Francis

I don’t know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot. - Marilyn Monroe

A man’s face is his autobiography. A woman’s face is her work of fiction. - Oscar Wilde

Well-behaved women seldom make history. - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

I lie to myself all the time. But I never believe me. - S. E. Hinton

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Love - Quotes

The truth is that the more intimately you know someone, the more clearly you’ll see their flaws. That’s just the way it is. This is why marriages fail, why children are abandoned, why friendships don’t last. You might think you love someone until you see the way they act when they’re out of money or under pressure or hungry. Love is different. Love is choosing to serve someone and be with someone in spite of their filthy heart. Love is patient and kind, love is deliberate. Love is hard. Love is pain and sacrifice, it’s seeing the darkness in another person and defying the impulse to jump ship. - Unknown

Something good is bound to happen when love is in your heart, for love and human kindness is where good things always start. There's goodness in your neighbour, there's goodness close at hand. Oh, let's spread love and kindness throughout all this blessed land! - Eli Bloodshy

Let someone love you just as you are. As flawed as you might be, as unattractive as you might feel, as unaccomplished as you might think you are; let someone love you just as you are. And let that someone be you. - Sandra King

More on Love Here

Quote Worthy

The heights by great men reached and kept were not attained in sudden flight but, they while their companions slept, they were toiling upwards in the night. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

We shall not cease from exploration and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and to know the place for the first time. - T.S. Eliot

What a distressing contrast there is between the radiant intelligence of the child and the feeble mentality of the average adult. - Sigmund Freud

An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered. - G. K. Chesterton

You can sway a thousand men by appealing to their prejudices quicker than you can convince one man by logic. - Robert A. Heinlein

It is not the beauty of a building you should look at; it’s the construction of the foundation that will stand the test of time. - David Allan Coe

If you are ever called upon to chasten a person, never chasten beyond the balm you have within you to bind up. - Brigham Young

To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable. - Helen Keller

Listen with ears of tolerance. See through the eyes of compassion. Speak with the language of love. - Unknown

Nothing is so difficult but that it may be found out by seeking. - Marcus Tullius Cicero

The buyer needs a hundred eyes, the seller but one. - George Herbert

If we don’t get lost, we’ll never find a new route. - Joan Littlewood

More quotes Here

A Parable

            There was a farmer who grew excellent quality corn. Every year he won the award for the best grown corn. One year a newspaper reporter interviewed him and learned something interesting about how he grew it. The reporter discovered that the farmer shared his seed corn with his neighbours. “How can you afford to share your best seed corn with your neighbours when they are entering corn in competition with yours each year?” the reporter asked.
            “Why sir,” said the farmer, “Didn’t you know? The wind picks up pollen from the ripening corn and swirls it from field to field. If my neighbours grow inferior corn, cross-pollination will steadily degrade the quality of my corn. If I am to grow good corn, I must help my neighbours grow good corn.”

Moral of the story:

            So is with our lives... Those who want to live meaningfully and well must help enrich the lives of others, for the value of a life is measured by the lives it touches. And those who choose to be happy must help others find happiness, for the welfare of each is bound up with the welfare of all...

Food for Thought

I don’t believe that we are what we do although many thinkers argue otherwise. I believe that what we do is, very often, a poor approximation of what we are – an imperfect manifestation of a much better totality. Even the best of us sometimes bite off, as it were, less than we can chew. - Donald Barthelme

A physician is not angry at the intemperance of a mad patient, nor does he take it ill to be railed at by a man in fever. Just so should a wise man treat all mankind, as a physician does his patient, and look upon them only as sick and extravagant. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Always Do Your Best. Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret. - Miguel Angel Ruiz

A cloud does not know why it moves in just such a direction and at such a speed… It feels an impulsion… this is the place to go now. But the sky knows the reasons and the patterns behind all clouds, and you will know, too, when you lift yourself high enough to see beyond horizons. - Richard Bach

Bad things do happen; how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have – life itself. - Walter Anderson

More Food for Thought Here

Humorous Quotes

I am happiest when I am idle. I could live for months without performing any kind of labour, and at the expiration of that time I should feel fresh and vigorous enough to go right on in the same way for numerous more months. - Artemus Ward

Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them is making a poop, the other one’s carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge. - Jerry Seinfeld

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up. - Phyllis Diller

Monday is like a math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness. - Unknown

I was born at home on newspapers ... I still have a story on my butt, although now the print is much larger. - Phyllis Diller

Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass that’s twice as big as it needs to be. - George Carlin

Whether you live to be 50 or 100 makes no difference, if you made no difference in the world. - Jarod Kintz

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin

There are no bad pictures; that’s just how your face looks sometimes. - Abraham Lincoln

A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her ears. - Woodrow Wyatt

I felt like an animal, and animals don’t know sin, do they? - Jess C. Scott

Age and glasses of wine should never be counted. - Unknown

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Friends n Friendship Quotes

A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway. - Jerome Cummings

A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself. - Jim Morrison

A friend may be waiting behind a stranger’s face. - Maya Angelou

A loyal friend laughs at your jokes when they’re not so good, and sympathizes with your problems when they're not so bad. - Arnold Glasgow

A man’s enemies are those he should endeavour first to make his friends. - Norman MacDonald

A true friend freely, advises justly, assists readily, adventures boldly, takes all patiently, defends courageously, and continues a friend unchangeably. - William Penn

A true friend, with an annual oiling, will run a lifetime, like a good watch. - Austin O’Malley

Don't let the grass grow on the path of friendship. - Native American Saying

False friends leave you in times of trouble. - Aesop

Friends are honest with each other. Even if the truth hurts. - Sarah Dessen

Friends should be like books, few, but hand-selected. - C.J. Langenhoven

Friends show their love in times of trouble, not in happiness. - Euripedes

In order to make friends you must first be friendly. - Dale Carnegie

No friendship is an accident. - O. Henry

Rare as is true love, true friendship is rarer. - Jean de La Fontaine

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