Puns

What is a Pun?
A Pun is a joke or type of wordplay in which similar senses or sounds of two words or phrases, or different senses of the same word, are deliberately confused.

Police were called to a day care center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. - Unknown

The barber opened up a shavings account. - Unknown

The batteries were given out free of charge. - Unknown

The guy that fell into the glass making machine made a spectacle of himself. - Unknown

The man put his name on the neck of his shirt so he would have collar ID. - Melman, Kentucky

The phone call interrupted my nap, and I never did get the rest. - Unknown

The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground. - Unknown

Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end. - Unknown

Time heals all wounds, but time also wounds all heels. - Unknown

Venison for dinner? Oh deer! - Unknown

Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms! - Unknown

When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she’d dye. - Unknown

When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A. - Unknown

When you’ve seen one shopping centre, you’ve seen a mall. - Unknown

Will this computer last five years? Obsoletely! - Unknown

Women are women and can’t help themselves. - William John Locke

You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish. - Unknown

Dad: Be careful standing near those trees.
Daughter: Why? The Sky’s clear.
Dad: I don’t know. They look kind of shady to me.