Monday, 24 July 2017

Humorous Quotes

According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful. - Robert De Niro

I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I’d be a college graduate today. - George Foreman

The worst feeling in the world is the homesickness that comes over a man occasionally when he is at home. - Edgar Watson Howe

The real wonder is that anyone stays together, as impossible to live with and as broken as we all are. - Kyran Pittman

If you want your wife to listen to you, then talk to another woman; she will be all ears. - Sigmund Freud

History, of course, is never real. People either glorify it or horrify it. Or at the very least colour it. - Paula Wall

I think crime pays. The hours are good, you meet a lot of interesting people, you travel a lot. - Woody Allen

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis

Disease increases in proportion to the increase in the number of doctors in a place. - Mahatma Gandhi

Trip over love, you can get up. Fall in love and you fall forever. - Unknown

Don’t mind your make-up, you’d better make your mind up. - Frank Zappa

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot. - Groucho Marx

Click Here for more humorous quotes, or Here for the book ‘Of Wit ‘n’ Humour’

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