Cheeky Humour

Laughter is our reflex to something that tickles our funny bone, our reflex to something which we find amusing. It is when we find, or see the humour – in a joke, an action or a situation. And it doesn’t matter if you revel in the coarsest puns or the raunchiest jokes.

Whatever humour works for you, it is great. The important thing is to have a sense of humour. And not to lose your sense of humour no matter how tough life gets.

Enjoy this week’s selection of humour! May you days be filled with laughter!

He had a new girl, and I told him she looked like Marilyn Monroe. He smiled because he thought I meant she was beautiful, and I smiled because I meant she looked like a corpse. - Jarod Kintz

If animals could speak the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow, but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party. - Ron White

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That’s common sense leaving your body. - Unknown

Golf... combines two favourite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick. - P. J. O’Rourke

They say ‘Follow your Heart’. But if its shattered to pieces…then which piece would you follow? - Unknown

He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt. - Joseph Heller

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food. - W.C. Fields

A man on a date wonders if he’ll get lucky. The woman already knows. - Monica Piper

Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place. - Johnny Carson

When you ask me what I am doing today, and I say ‘nothing’, it does not mean I am free. It means I am doing nothing. - Unknown

I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don’t want to pull a muscle, so I stretch a lot. That’s why I’m constantly either rolling my eyes or yawning. - Jarod Kintz

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