Monday, 23 June 2014

Humorous Quotes

Quotes which are funny, ironical, as well as simply, or profoundly true.

Committees have become so important nowadays that subcommittees have to be appointed to do the work. - Laurence Peter

Consultants are people who borrow your watch and tell you what time it is, and then walk off with the watch. - Robert Townsend

Cover that bosom that I must not see: souls are wounded by such things. - Jean Baptiste Moliere

Decorate your home. It gives the illusion that your life is more interesting than it really is. - Charles Schulz

Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. - George Bernard Shaw

Democracy is a process by which people are free to choose the person who will get the blame. - Laurence Peter

Did nothing in particular, and did it very well. - William S. Gilbert

Diplomacy is to do and say the nastiest things in the nicest way. - Isaac Goldberg

Disclaimer: If anyone disagrees with anything I say, I am quite prepared to not only retract it, but also to deny under oath I ever said it. - Tom Lehrer

Dont itch for things youre not willing to scratch for. - Unknown

Don’t knock it, it’s sex with someone you love. - Woody Allen of masturbation

Don’t knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn’t start a conversation if it didn’t change once in a while. - Kin Hubbard

Dont put too fine a point to your wit for fear it should get blunted. - Miguel de Cervantes

Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles Schulz

Don’t worry what people think. They don’t do it very often. - Unknown

No comments: