Sometimes...

Life is never easy, never straight forward. There are always twists and turns. Not all things in life will happen the way we intent them to, the way they are supposed to. Sometimes, shit happens to our best laid plans, turning our world upside down. We might be sure, confident, hopeful one moment, and disappointed, lost, unsure the next.

That is why, we have to be mentally prepared for eventualities, that are contrary to our expectations. No harm lowering our expectations a bit. We can always jump for joy later – rather than being too optimistic, only to be disappointed later.

So, it is good to bear in mind, to understand, and accept that ‘Sometimes... in life.’ And sometimes, a change of mindset, or a change of viewpoint, is all it takes to turn a situation around.

It’s not always about fixing what is broken. Sometimes, it’s about starting over and creating something new. - Unknown

Sometimes, you have to stop thinking too much and just go where your heart takes you. - Unknown

Sometimes, you need to step out, get some air and remind yourself of who you are and where you want to be. - Unknown

Sometimes, a wind comes up, blows you off course. You’re not ready for it, but if you’re lucky, you end up in a more interesting place than you’d planned. - Nora Roberts

Sometimes, it is better to be kind than to be right. We do not need and intelligent mind that speak, but a patient heart that listens. - Unknown

Sometimes, our light goes out, but is blown again into instant flame by an encounter with another human being. - Albert Schweitzer

Sometimes, it’s necessary to go a long distance out of the way in order to come back a short distance correctly. - Edward Albee

Sometimes, it feels so good to just sit by yourself, relax and not talk to anyone. - Kristen Butler

Sometimes, not seeing things can be a blessing. - August Strindberg

Sometimes, music speaks what you feel inside. - Unknown

Sometimes, there are no words. - Unknown

Sometimes, I wish I were a little kid again, skinned knees are easier to fix than broken hearts. - Unknown

Satay by the Bay

Satay by the Bay is an outdoor food place where you can get to sample all the local delights. It is a good place to have a meal, sampling all the different kinds of food, while you bond with your friends or family. There are many food stalls there, and you will be spoilt for choice.

I was there with a friend recently. And this is what we had for dinner.

This is Satay. Satay are small pieces of meat skewed and barbecued. They are served with cucumbers, onions and peanut sauce. It is difficult to tell from the picture, but there are ten chicken satays and ten pork satays.

Beside the satays are what the locals call Otah. They are fish pate wrapped in coconut leaves.

This is sting ray, another local favourite. It is wrapped in banana leave and barbecued. The sting ray is then slathered with Sambal, a chilli paste and a calamansi, to be squeezed over the dish.

This is stir fried bean curd, Thai style. Bean curd stir fried with sweet and spicy sauce, pineapple cubes, onions and cucumbers.

This is a dish of green vegetables stir fried with oil and garlic.

A simple but delicious meal. Very nice indeed.

Here are some of the other stalls offering mouth-watering cuisines

Satay by the Bay is open daily from 11:00am to 10:00 pm.

Do You Gossip?

I do. I admit it unashamedly.

I think if prostitution is the oldest profession, gossip must be the oldest social past time. Let’s face it. The world will be very quiet indeed if people do not gossip. People would have nothing to say to each other, after talking the weather to death.

When we meet up with friends, what do we do? We talk about what is going on in our lives. And we inevitably ended up talking about other people as well – people who are associated with us – our mutual friends, colleagues, family etc. It is through this exchange of information that we are updated on the people, events, and things happening around us. If you are a senior, like me, you would also like to know who is still around and who has passed on, who has dementia, who has Parkinson, and who has been ravaged by Cancer... etc.but I digressed.

Generally, most gossips are just harmless digs at the expense of the people we know. There is no real malice intended. And that’s the way it should be.

Trouble comes when we say more than we should – like, when we pass sensitive, personal information that cause harm, hurt or embarrassment, or information that were meant for our ears only.

So, there are a couple of things to bear in mind when it comes to gossiping.

1. Never divulge sensitive information told to us in confidence.

2. Do not spread lies, half-truths and untruth when gossiping.

3. Always be mindful of other people’s feelings. If you are unsure whether you should make known certain facts to all and sundry, don’t. If you think that a particular gossip might annoy or cause embarrassment to someone, then, it is better to hold your tongue. But if it is something that is going to be common knowledge, then there is no harm in talking about it, although you might want to consider whether it will be better if that information comes from someone else.

4. There is one unbreakable rule in the gossip game. You must never betray your friends. No matter how juicy the gossip you have, no matter how you are dying to talk about it and get it out – don’t!

Gossip has its humanitarian side too. It enables us to keep track of each other. For example – Tom wouldn’t have visited Dick if Harry hadn’t told Tom that Dick had a stroke. A simple example, but you get the drift. And there are times when we feel awkward in saying something, but friends do that for you when you are not around. It saves you embarrassment.

However, bear in mind that whoever gossips to you will gossip about you. Therefore, observe how someone gossips to you. Does he/she just talk without reserve, or does he/she speak cautiously and generally. If people gossip to you without reserve, then you would want to be careful of what you tell them. Because, surely, they will gossip freely about you too. But if what they gossip about are mundane, general stuff and are tight-lipped about personal stuff, then they are people whom you can take into your confidence.

I guess gossiping is an art too. You will notice that some people talk a lot but do not reveal very much. And there are those you spill out everything in the minimum number of words.

I would be very careful of the latter. It would imply that they not only enjoy gossiping, they are very good at it, and they gossip without reserve.

So, I guess there is no harm in gossiping if we are mindful of what we share.

What do you think? Is it all right to gossip? Feel free to share your thoughts on the subject.

Gossip is like military intelligence, and it is strategically vital to have up to the minute reports on other people’s loyalties and antagonisms. Shutting your ears to gossip is all very noble until you discover to your cost that someone you thought was a friend has made a business alliance with an enemy and is dutifully feeding all your gossip into his computer. - Unknown

Nobody will keep the thing he hears to himself, and nobody will repeat just what he hears and no more. - Unknown

Doesn't matter what you do, or how you do it, your neighbours are going to talk about you anyway. - Felder Rushing

Gossip is when you hear something you like about someone you don't. - Earl Wilson

It is easier to dam a river than to stop gossip. - Filipino Proverb

Mushrooms and Toadstools

Here in the tropics, after a heavy rain, the next morning you will see mushrooms sprouting up anywhere, and sometimes everywhere.

When we were young, my siblings and I would go picking mushrooms – not realizing that some of them are poisonous, and if we had inhaled the pores we would have fallen sick. Luckily, we were not poisoned, and I lived to tell the tale.

I was told that these mushrooms are also known as toadstools because they looked just like a perfect spot for a toad to sit. Maybe because of this, toadstools are thought to be poisonous. Actually, not all toadstools are toxic. Some toadstools are not poisonous at all. The same goes for mushrooms. While most mushrooms are edible, some mushrooms can be deadly.

So, how do you differentiate between a mushroom and a toadstool? This is the answer I found on one site – quite humorous answer too. “If it looks like a good spot for a toad to sit, then go ahead and call it a toadstool. No one will mind.”

So, I guess both names are interchangable, or both meant the same thing.

Here are some pictures of mushrooms I took on my walk. Have a look and see which you would call a mushroom, and which you would call a toadstool.

Life's Little Lessons

Quotes, aphorisms, proverbs... they teach a lesson in a few words, or a couple of sentences. Quotes made us think. When we think, we analyse the truth contain therein, and we learn the wisdom in them. Quotes can serve as our signposts on our journey through life. They are our teachers, guardians, and friends … always there to patiently motivate, encourage, advice, counsel, console, enlighten, educate, and at times to egg us on when we are feeling down, discouraged or disillusioned. Some of these teachers are centuries old. But their words of wisdom are still as applicable today as when they were first said, centuries ago.

Let no man imagine that he has no influence. Whoever he may be, and where he may be place; the who thinks becomes a light and a power. - Henry George

The winds and waves are always on the side of the ablest navigators. - Edward Gibbon

Our friends show us what we can do; our enemies teach us what we must do. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind. - C.S Lewis

Ideologies separate us. Dreams and anguish bring us together. - Eugene Ionesco

An educated guess is just as accurate and far faster than compiled errors. - George S. Patton

Opportunities to find deeper powers within ourselves come when life seems most challenging. - Joseph Campbell

Someone who thinks the world is always cheating him is right – he is missing that wonderful feeling of trust in someone or something. - Andrew V. Mason

The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you cannot have them. - Unknown

It’s better to walk alone, than with a crowd going in the wrong direction. Diane Grant

From each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs. - Karl Marx

There is a space between man’s imagination and man’s attainment that may only be traversed by his longing. - Khalil Gibran

Life is Simple

Life itself is simple. It’s just not easy. - Steve Maraboli.

Life has a very simple plot: first you’re here and then you’re not. - Eric Idle

Life is indeed simple. That is a truism. We wake up in the morning, and we go to bed at night. In between, we do the best that we can.

Life is really simple, but man insist on making it complicated. - Confucius

We think too much, and we worry too much. We are greedy and egoistic. We hunger for status and recognition. We complicate our lives, by our ignorance.

Instead of being contented with what we have, we hanker after useless things. We buy things that we don’t need, to impress people who don’t care about us. We spent our health chasing after money, and then spend our money chasing after health.

All that we need are something to eat, fresh air, fresh water, a job, a couple of friends worth the name, maybe someone to love, and someone to love us. That is our life’s basic needs. Once you have the basic needs, all else is not of the utmost importance, is it?

We were born into this world with nothing and we will leave this world with nothing. So, don’t let things be the center of your life, don’t let your life be about things.

If you have a complex life, make it simple; if you have a simple life, continue it that way! - Mehmet Murat Ildan

Life is beautiful in its simplicity. - Thomas Matthiessen

The greatest step toward a life of simplicity is to learn to let go. - Steve Maraboli

Be as simple as you can; you will be astonished to see how uncomplicated and happy your life can become. - Paramahansa Yogananda

Reduce the complexity of life by eliminating the needless wants of life, and the labours of life reduce themselves. - Edwin Way Teale

Human life when rightly lived is simple ... but it is not rightly lived while it is bound to a complexity of lusts, desires, and wants – these are not the real life, but the burning fever and painful disease which originate in an unenlightened condition of mind. - James Allen

Our life is frittered away by detail. An honest man has hardly need to count more than his ten fingers, or in extreme cases he may add his ten toes, and lump the rest. Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity. I say, let your affairs be as two or three, and not a hundred or a thousand; instead of a million count half a dozen, and keep your accounts on your thumb nail. - Henry David Thoreau

To find the universal elements enough; to find the air and the water exhilarating; to be refreshed by a morning walk or an evening saunter; to be thrilled by the stars at night; to be elated over a bird’s nest or a wild flower in spring – these are some of the rewards of the simple life. - John Burroughs

Live a simple life! Keep your life simple. Lighten your lifeboat. Learn to let go. Don’t let the unnecessities weigh you down. Enjoy your life, and be happy. Don’t complicate it.

Mahjong Game

Mahjong, also known as Mah Jong – is a tile based game invented by the Chinese. As to when exactly it was invented, there is some debate about it, but I guess it is safe to say it was at least 150 years ago.

It’s a game for four players – a game of skill, intelligence, calculation and, as with any game, there is always the element of luck. Research has shown that seniors who play mahjong keep dementia at bay. Hence, doctors here recommend that seniors should play the game.

I learned to play the mahjong only after I retired, when I had time on my hands. There was a time when I played mahjong almost every other weekend. It took me some time to learn how to play the game right, how to be good at it. As they say, you pay to learn the game. It sure cost me a fair bit, learning to play the game. But I didn’t mind it very much. I had fun, and I treat the losses as buying my friends dinner and drinks.

Unfortunately, death claimed one of the players, and another moved overseas. It is difficult to find another two players for the game. Although many people know how to play mahjong, it takes strong friendship to not quarrel over disagreements during the game. Some people play to win, some people are poor losers. People like that will not be friends for long playing mahjong. Or they would be playing with an agenda. That would make the atmosphere very tense. It would not be fun at all. Good friends have ended up as strangers because of disagreement while playing, especially when money is involved.

My friends and I, we play what we call friendly games. There is a lot of give and take. We enjoy the game, the camaraderie, and the time together. We have known each other for a long time, and we all know each other’s temperament. Most importantly we understand - friendship first.

I like the game very much. I am slightly better at it now, but still far from good. You have to be quick, sharp, attentive and skilful in reading the cards, in reading how the other players are playing their cards. Probably, that is why it keeps the mind agile and limber. Mahjong sessions are also very good for social bonding, a good way for four good friends to enjoy an afternoon, or evening together.

There are videos on Youtube to teach you how to play the game. Here is one. This one is actually quite thorough. Just remember it is a Chinese variation. The totaling of points is quite different from the way we do it here in Singapore.

It helps if you understand the few mandarin words in the game, So, the first thing you need to do is to learn, or at least familiarise yourself with the few mandarin words, although from the video, you can see that it is not really necessary.

Today, Mahjong is more popular than ever, spanning the globe. However, different countries have different variations of the rules of this game – Hong Kong, Taiwan, Japan, Singapore… each have their way of totalling the points. So, even if you play mahjong very well, when you are in a different country, it is good to check if their way of totalling the points is the same as the way you are used to.

Nowadays, there are mahjong tables that come automated. It will ‘wash’ the cards for you. Check this out in the video.

But I don’t think this has catched on yet. Part of the fun in the game is the washing and building of the tiles. It’s like the kindle and the book. Some people still prefer to turn and feel the page, and also the smell of a book.

Have a look at the video below if you are curious to know how mahjongs are made. This requires skill and craftsmanship.

Decisions

All decisions – big and small have some impact on us, some more so than others, some sooner than later, and some we are more aware than others. We are the result of all our decisions. Our future is the result of our daily decisions.

Everyday, from the moment we wake up, we have a host of decisions to make. Some of them are minor ones like what to wear to work, what to have for breakfast etc. These decisions do not have a big impact on our lives.

However, big decisions like, should you resign from your job? Should you buy the condominium you have been eyeing for a while? Decisions as such have a big impact on your life. You will want to think carefully before you decide.

Some decisions do not have to be made at once, especially big decisions that are going to have a big impact on your life. When that is the case, hold off your decision. Think about it from time to time. Give it a cooling period, and think of it some more. When you are sure of what you want, then make the decision.

Never base your decisions on the advice of those who do not have to deal with the results. It is easy to suggest, to advice, but ultimately, you are the one who have to live with the decision. If you have to live with a mistake, it might as well be your mistake.

Decisions determine destiny. It is in your moment of decision that your destiny is shaped. - Tony Robbins

Stay committed to your decisions, but stay flexible in your approach. - Tony Robbins

A real decision is measured by the fact that you’ve taken a new action. If there’s no action, you haven’t truly decided. - Tony Robbins

Decisiveness is a characteristic of high-performing men and women. Almost any decision is better than no decision at all. - Brian Tracy

Bold decisions give the best promise of success. - Edwin Rommel

Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Boon Tong Kee Restaurant

My friend was showing me the River Valley Road area when we came upon the Boon Tong Kee Restaurant. He was telling me it is a reputable restaurant, and it is always very busy because their food is nice.

Since it was almost dinner time, I suggested we had dinner there. He was agreeable to that.

It was just about 6 pm and there were only a couple of tables occupied.

They have a few signature dishes. Chicken is the house speciality, and besides that, they do Zi Char too. Zi Char meaning fried or cooked in high temperature wok.

We ordered half a chicken, two eggs, and a dish of tofu, and two plates of rice, and a pot of Chinese tea.

This is what we had.

Half a steamed chicken accompanied with a dish of chilli, and sweet dark sauce, and pickled vegetables This is one of their signature dish. The chicken was very tender and nice. Lovely!

This is a simple dish of two hard boiled eggs.

This is deep fried tofu, another of their signature dish. It comes with a light green sauce which I thought was wasabi sauce. But it didn't taste like wasabi sauce. The tofu was crispy on the outside and so soft inside that it melts in your mouth when you bit into it. Very nice indeed.

This is chicken rice. It is plain rice cooked in chicken stock. The rice was good too. Just the right hardness, and that was the first time, I saw rice served in a triangle.

By the time we left, the restaurant was already full, with the tables along the corridor occupied as well.

It was a simple meal. But it was very nice and I enjoyed it very much.

My friend paid for the meal, so I wasn't sure how much it came to except that it was under $50 SGD

Service was efficient but not very personal. The food came fast. We didn't have to wait very long for it.

This is the address of the place.

425 River Valley Road, Singapore 248324
Tel: (65) 67363213
Opening hours:
Mon to Sat: 11:15 - 16:00, 16:30 - 04:00
Sun: 11:15 - 16:00, 16:30 - 03:00

Making Friends

Sometimes, it is easier to make friends with dogs than humans. Dogs are more friendly, and have no agendas.

Here are a brother and sister who take walks with their owner in the evenings. Is is too politically incorrect to call him an owner. Well, I will just call him ‘daddy’ then.

These two tiny things bark a lot – at other dogs, at children, giving the children a scare and sending the little ones screaming and scampering. One day, they were doing that as I was nearing them, and I went, “Aren’t you naughty fellows, frightening the children.”

‘Daddy’ explained that they are all barks. That was how 'daddy' and I started talking. So, from then on, whenever I see them, I will stop for a chat, and give the dogs a rub and scratch. They loved it.

One day, I sat down with them, and one of them hopped on to my lap and made herself comfortable. I gave her a scratch and a rub. She was so delighted. When I stopped, she indicated she wanted more by taking my hand in her mouth and drawing it towards her. That was an amazing moment for me.

At first, I was worried that she might decide to have a taste of some human meat. But once I relaxed, she was able to draw my hand towards her.

Dogs know who is good to them. They are easy to love. The fact that those two warmed up to me showed they have good taste too.

Humour

Living Life to the Fullest

We live, a brief moment in time; like the passing cloud, here one moment, gone the next. So, we should treasure the time we have, and make full use of it. Laugh your heart out. Dance in the rain. Cherish the moment. Live life to the fullest while you are still healthy.

We can smile, breathe, walk, and eat our meals in a way that allows us to be in touch with the abundance of happiness that is available. - Thich Nhat Hanh

This is called mindful living. You live one moment at a time, one day at a time. You will never live this day again. But by living one day at a time, you live all the days of your life. Do not let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past, or for the future. Relax and enjoy life. Live in the moment. The moment is all you have.

If you don't live you life well now, when are you going to find the time to go back and live it over?

All of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today. - Dale Carnegie

Live not as though there were a thousand years ahead of you. Begin, at once, to live while you are still healthy and have all your faculties intact. Live each day like it is the last.

It’s only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth – and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up – that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had. - Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

He who lives in the present lives in eternity. - Ludwig Wittgenstein

Live all you can; it’s a mistake not to. It doesn’t so much matter what you do in particular, so long as you have your life. If you haven’t had that what have you had? - Henry James

Live neither in the past nor in the future, but let each day’s work absorb your entire energies, and satisfy your widest ambition. - William Osler

Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Continue to learn. Play with abandon. Choose with no regret. Laugh! Do what you love. Love as if this is all there is. - Mary Anne Radmacher-Hershey

He lives long who lives well. - J. Wilson

We only have one life and one body to care of, and we better do it right. You never know what tomorrow may bring and so we better live this life the best we can and be grateful for everything we have. - Novak Djokovic

Let us live while we live, and snatch each fleeting moment of truth and love and beauty. - Sarah Alden Bradford Ripley

An Art Exhibition

A solo art exhibition – ‘100 Miniature Paintings by Ernest Chan’ at ‘SEED the Art Space’.

Yesterday, I went with some friends to the opening of our mutual friend’s solo art exhibition. Some of you will remember that I posted about a visit to an art exhibition recently - on the first of September. That was a group exhibition by Ernest and his students. Yesterday’s was his solo exhibition of 100 miniature oil paintings on wooden blocks of 3 cm x 6 cm, 3 cm by 3 cm, and 3 cm in diameter.

Here are some of the paintings on exhibition. Miniature oil painting on wood - 3 cm in diameter. These come in a glass container. I think it is a nice touch, and I am sure they will be very popular.

Magnifying glass are provided in case you want to have a closer look.

These are 3 cm by 3 cm.

This is to give you an idea of how big the blocks are. They are smaller than the first joint of my thumb.

And this is just past the second joint of my pinky.

The exhibition hall wasn't too big. But then, you don't need to have a big room for a 100 pieces of 3 cm by 6 cm blocks, or smaller, do you? Still, the room filled up quickly after the opening of the exhibition.

As of last night, I understand that 30% of the works have been sold. I would say it was a very good start of the exhibition, and I am sure, in the coming days, many more will be sold. I am happy for him.

Here is the Catalog of the Exhibition – if you are interested. You will see all the works of the exhibition, pictures of the artist at work, his curriculum vitae, and an explanation of the exhibition.

Here’s the address of the exhibition
SEED the art space
Unit 03-11 Herencia 46 Kim Yam Road

The exhibition is on until the 19th of January, but it is only on Saturdays and Sundays only – from 1pm to 6pm Weekdays are by appointments only.