Monday, 23 March 2020

Of Quips and Quirks

Don’t take life too seriously. Relax, have a bit of fun and most importantly laugh as often as you can. Life is too short to waste it worrying about things you have no control over.

Enjoy this selection of quips. And may your weekend be filled with laughter.

Alcohol does not solve problems, but then again, neither does milk. - Unknown

If you want to change the world, do it while you’re single. Once you’re married, you can’t even change the TV channel. - Unknown

As long as there are birthday Gifts, I don’t mind celebrating my birthdays every day. - Unknown

Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance. - Phyllis Diller

People have an annoying habit of remembering things they shouldn’t. - Christopher Paolini

Hold your wife’s hand in the mall because if you let go, she’ll start shopping. It looks romantic but it’s actually economic. - Unknown

Age is just a number, totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine. - Joan Collins

Congress would give the people what they wanted if the people knew what they wanted, and if Congress could give it to them. - Evan Esar

People seldom notice old clothes if you wear a big smile. - Lee Mildon

Before I was married, I had a hundred theories about raising children and no children. Now, I have three children and no theories. - John Wilmot

Pretending to care what men think is an art. It takes moments to learn, but lifetimes to master. I’d like to believe I’m an expert. - Dennis Sharpe

If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question? - Lily Tomlin

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