Of Wit And Humour

Humour has an intellectual as well as emotional element. That is why some people do not share our sense of humour. We are all different. What we find funny, others may find coarse. But that’s okay. It doesn’t matter what kind of humour you like, as long as it makes you laugh.

I hope the following selection of humorous quotes will bring on a chuckle, or put a smile on your face. They are humorous, witty, and there is truth in them.

The ideal man doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, doesn't do drugs, doesn't swear, doesn't get angry, doesn't exist. - Unknown

Life is like a grammar lesson. You find the past perfect and the present tense. - Adolf Hitler

Accept the fact that some days you’re the pigeon, and some days you're the statue! - Unknown

It's hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse. - Adlai Stevenson

Journalists do not believe the lies of politicians, but they do repeat them, which is even worse! - Michel Colucci

A man doesn’t know what he knows until he knows what he doesn’t know. - Laurence Peter

That’s a valiant flea that dares eat his breakfast on the lip of a lion. - William Shakespeare

If it’s sent by ship then it's a cargo, if it’s sent by road then it’s a shipment. - Dave Allen

How do you know my dim-witted inexperience isn't really a subtle form of manipulation used to lower people's expectations, thereby enhancing my ability to manoeuvre myself within any given situation? - Unknown

For one to admire a woman merely for her beauty, is to love the building for its exterior; but to love one for the greatness of her soul, is to appreciate the tenement for its intrinsic value. - William Scott Downey

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