Friends and Friendship - Quotes

Learn how to be respectful to your friends, don’t just start arguments with them and don’t tell them the reason, always remember your friends will be there quicker than your family. Learn to remember you got great friends, don’t forget that and they will always care for you no matter what. Always remember to smile and look up at what you got in life. - Marilyn Monroe

You can go through life and make new friends every year – every month practically – but there was never any substitute for those friendships of childhood that survive into adult years. Those are the ones in which we are bound to one another with hoops of steel. - Alexander McCall Smith

It’s important to make friendships that are deeper than gossiping and drinking, and smoking, and going out. Make friends who you can go get breakfast with, make friends you can cry with, make friends who support your life goals and believe in you. - Unknown

A sincere friend conceals all your deformities, deceives and convince others that you are extremely perfect, the insincere will tell the truth of destruction, leave you open for others to glare and laugh. - Michael Bassey Johnson

Friendship – my definition – is built on two things. Respect and trust. Both elements have to be there. And it has to be mutual. You can have respect for someone, but if you don’t have trust, the friendship will crumble. - Stieg Larsson

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Quote Worthy

It’s so important to realize that every time you get upset, it drains your emotional energy. Losing your cool makes you tired. Getting angry a lot messes with your health. - Joyce Meyer

A person is a novel: you don't know how it will end until the very last page. Otherwise it wouldn't be worth reading to the very end. - Yevgeny Zamyatin

The fact that you have been knocked down is interesting, but the length of time you remained down is important. - Austin O’Malley

If you don’t invest very much, then defeat doesn’t hurt very much and winning is not very exciting. - Dick Vermeil

The attempt is all the wedge that splits its knotty way betwixt the impossible and possible. - Alice Cary

People have a tendency to rationalize what they can, and forget what they can't. - Richie Tankersley Cusick

When my absence doesn’t alter your life, then my presence has no meaning in your life. - Unknown

We have to continually be jumping off cliffs and developing our wings on the way down. - Kurt Vonnegut

Only once you have carried your own water, will you learn the value of every drop. - Unknown

Never give in except to convictions of honour and good sense. - Winston Churchill

Sometimes we create our own heartbreaks through expectation. - Unknown

An aim in life is the only fortune worth finding. - Robert Louis Stevenson

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Puns

What is a Pun?
A Pun is a joke or type of wordplay in which similar senses or sounds of two words or phrases, or different senses of the same word, are deliberately confused.

Pun

A man in Thailand was arrested with more than 10,000 pairs of stolen underwear. Legal experts are expecting a brief trial. - Jimmy Fallon

A pun is the lowest form of humour, unless you thought of it yourself. - Doug Larson

Divorce is the price people pay for playing with matches. - Evan Esar

Every dog has his day, unless he loses his tail, then he has a weak-end. - June Carter Cash

Humorists can never start to take themselves seriously. It’s literary suicide. - Erma Bombeck

I doubt Vodka is the answer, but it’s worth a shot. - Unknown

If there were an international butt competition, Eric would win, hands down – or cheeks up. - Charlaine Harris

She used to be a schoolteacher, but she has no class now. - Fred Allen

As we understand it, the surest way to make a living by the pen is to raise pigs. - Robert Elliott Gonzales

Why should you never iron a four leaf clover? You don't want to press your luck. - Unknown

A bicycle can't stand alone. It's two tired. - Unknown

A boiled egg is hard to beat. - Unknown

A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail. - Unknown

A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart. - Unknown

A new type of broom came out, it is sweeping the nation. - Unknown

Food for Thought

Humility does not mean that conceit doesn't arise in the mind; it means that conceit is met with the wisdom of not taking the inflation personally. Usually when we are feeling inflated and conceited, we believe the ego's insistence that we are better or worse than others. Humility is a practice that allows us to override that insistence and arrive at a wise relationship to the ego. It takes constant vigilance, because the mind is constantly creating (and attempting to give permanence to) a self out of that aspect of our experience that we call ego, constantly creating conceit. - Noah Levine

Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up interest wrinkles the soul. You are as young as your faith, as old as your doubt; as young as your self-confidence, as old as your fear; as young as your hope as old as your despair. In the central place of every heart there is a recording chamber. So long as it receives messages of beauty, hope, cheer and courage, so long are you young. When your heart is covered with the snows of pessimism and the ice of cynicism, then, and then only, are you grown old. And then, indeed as the ballad says, you just fade away. - Douglas MacArthur

The way we respond to criticism pretty much depends on the way we respond to praise. If praise humbles us, then criticism will build us up. But if praise inflates us, then criticism will crush us; and both responses lead to our defeat. - Warren Wiersbe

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Humorous Quotes

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear. - Dave Barry

A new study found that most people can't go 10 minutes without lying. But since the study took 20 minutes nobody knows what to believe. - Jimmy Fallon

Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain't lawful tender for a loaf of bread. - Josh Billings

Men have a better time than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier. - H. L. Mencken

Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright. - Laurell K. Hamilton

Love is what you make it. Unfortunately, I can’t make it today, as I have a doctor’s appointment. - Jarod Kintz

If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library. - Frank Zappa

Dating a tennis player is risky - love means nothing to us. - Anna Kournikova

It’s a street food vendor! Stop asking for the health score rating. - Regina Griffin

I’m no model lady. A model’s just an imitation of the real thing. - Mae West

A good loser is all right, but it isn't so much fun to beat him. - Evan Esar

Marriage is grand. Divorce is about twenty grand. - Jay Leno

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Quote Worthy

I know quite certainly that I myself have no special gift. Curiosity, obsession and dogged endurance combined with self-critique have brought me my ideas. - Albert Einstein

As you get older you will understand more and more that it’s not about what you look like or what you own, it’s all about the person you’ve become. - Unknown

People think of the inventor as a screwball, but no one ever asks the inventor what he thinks of other people. - Charles F. Kettering

If you look in the eyes of the young, you see flame. If you look in the eyes of the old, you see light. - Victor Hugo

He that would live in peace and at ease, must not speak all he knows, nor judge all he sees. - Benjamin Franklin

One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries. - A. A. Milne

The life of the nation is secure only while the nation is honest, truthful, and virtuous. - Frederick Douglass

How much I missed, simply because I was afraid of missing it. - Paulo Coelho

Sometimes the things that hurt you the most, teach you the greatest lessons. - Unknown

Never Let anyone tell you that you can’t; show them that you can. - Gloria Mallette

It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence. - Martin Rees

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Definitions You Won’t See In The Dictionary

Mosquito: an insect that makes you like flies better. - Unknown

Nillionaire: a person with little or no money. - Unknown

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. - Unknown

Raisin: a grape with a sunburn. - Unknown

Secret: something you tell to one person at a time. - Unknown

Tomorrow: one of the greatest labor saving devices of today. - Unknown

Toothache: the pain that drives you to extraction. - Unknown

Transvestite: a guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary. - Unknown

Wrinkles: something other people have, similar to my character lines. - Unknown

Yawn: an honest opinion openly expressed without a word. - Unknown

Academe: an ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. - Ambrose Bierce

Academy: a modern school where football is taught. - Ambrose Bierce

Acquaintance: a person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. - Ambrose Bierce

Ambition: an overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead. - Ambrose Bierce

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Food for Thought

We seldom realize, for example that our most private thoughts and emotions are not actually our own. For we think in terms of languages and images which we did not invent, but which were given to us by our society. - Alan W. Watts

So, I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybe we'll never know most of them. But even if we don't have the power to choose where we come from, we can still choose where we go from there. We can still do things. - Stephen Chbosky

We can help a person to be himself by our own willingness to steep ourselves temporarily in his world, in his private feelings and experiences. By our affirmation of the person as he is, we give him support and strength to take the next step in his own growth. - Clark Moustakas

We have come out of the time when obedience, the acceptance of discipline, intelligent courage, and resolution were most important, into that more difficult time when it is a man’s duty to understand his world rather than to simply fight for it. - Ernest Hemingway

Vulnerability is the essence of romance. It’s the art of being uncalculated, the willingness to look foolish, the courage to say, ‘This is me, and I’m interested in you enough to show you my flaws with the hope that you may embrace me for all that I am but, more important, all that I am not. - Ashton Kutcher

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Humorous Quotes

Adam was but human – this explains it all. He did not want the apple for the apple’s sake, he wanted it only because it was forbidden. The mistake was in not forbidding the serpent; then he would have eaten the serpent. - Mark Twain

I like to call in sick to work at places where I've never held a job. Then when the manager tells me I don't work there, I tell them I'd like to. But not today, as I'm sick. - Jarod Kintz

My grandfather’s a little forgetful, but he likes to give me advice. One day, he took me aside and left me there. - Ron Richards

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

Death and taxes and childbirth! There's never any convenient time for any of them! - Margaret Mitchell

Many a wedding takes place when a man can't afford to go steady with a girl any longer. - Evan Esar

Never wear your best trousers when you go out to fight for freedom and truth. - Henrik Ibsen

It’s been so long since I made love, I can’t even remember who gets tied up. - Joan Rivers

If you have everything under control, you’re not moving fast enough. - Mario Andretti

Lawyers are men whom we hire to protect us from lawyers. - Elbert Hubbard

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food. - W.C. Fields

Artificial plants grow best in artificial light. - Regina Griffin

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Change - Quotes

All times are changing times, but ours is one of massive, rapid moral and mental transformation. Archetypes turn into millstones, large simplicities get complicated, chaos becomes elegant, and what everybody knows is true turns out to be what some people used to think. - Ursula K. Le Guin

Change does not change tradition, it strengthens it. Change is a challenge and an opportunity, not a threat. - Prince Philip

Change does not fail to occur because of insincerity. The heart patient is not insincere about his wish to keep living, even as he reaches for another cigarette. Change fails to occur because we mean both things. It fails to occur because we are a living contradiction. - Robert Kegan & Lisa Laskow Lahey

Change doth unknit the tranquil strength of men. - Matthew Arnold

Change has to come for life to struggle forward. - Helen Hollick

Change is certain. Peace is followed by disturbances; departure of evil men by their return. Such recurrences should not constitute occasions for sadness but realities for awareness, so that one may be happy in the interim. - I Ching

Change is inevitable. Change is constant. - Benjamin Disraeli

Change is mandatory for extraordinary results. - Unknown

Change is never easy … there’s always a cost. - Unknown

Change is not merely necessary to life, it is life. - Alvin Toffler

Change is not something that we should fear. Rather, it is something that we should welcome. For without change, nothing in this world would ever grow or blossom, and no one in this world would ever move forward to become the person they’re meant to be. - Unknown

Change is the end result of all true learning. - Leo Buscaglia

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