Glorious Insults

These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words. Some of them anyway.

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I dote on his very absence. - William Shakespear

I don’t make jokes – I just watch the government and report the facts. - Will Rogers

I drink to make other people interesting. - George Jean Nathan

I have come up with a plan so cunning you could stick a tail on it and call it a weasel. - Rowan Atkinson

I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I’m not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant. - Robert Mccloskey

I like to think positive. I’m positive you don’t know what the hell you are talking about. - Unknown

I never forget a face but in your case, I’ll make an exception. - Groucher Marx

I never liked you, and I always will. - Samuel Goldwyn

I regard you with an indifference closely bordering on aversion. - Robert Luis Stevenson

I see no point in arguing with you. You do a fine job of proving your complete ignorance on your own. - Unknown

I understand a fury in your words, But not the words. - William Shakespeare

If it were not for the intellectual snobs who pay - in solid cash - the arts would perish with their starving practitioners. Let us thank heaven for hypocrisy. - Aldous Huxley

If that is not enough, will you please politely indicate that she can go to hell. - Rudolf Bing

It was as helpful as throwing a drowning man both ends of the rope. - Arthur Baer

It was not that she was out of temper, but that the world was not equal to the demands of her fine organism. - George Eliot

Mom always tell me if I can’t say anything nice, then don’t say anything at all. And some people wonder why I’m so quiet around them. - Unknown