Monday, 6 April 2015

Humorous Quotes

Quotes which are funny, ironical, quirky, some of which are also profoundly true.

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. - Oscar Wilde

To make a long story short, there’s nothing like having a boss walk in. - Doris Lilly

To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing. - Mark Twain

Today, there is a pervasive tendency to treat children as adults, and adults as children. The options of children are thus steadily expanded, while those of adults are progressively constricted. The result is unruly children and childish adults. - Thomas Szasz

Too many couples marry for better or for worse, but not for good. - Unknown

Trouble in marriage often starts when a man gets so busy earning his salt that he forgets his sugar. - Unknown

True friends stab you in the front. - Oscar Wilde

True patriots we; for be it understood, We left our country for our country's good. - George Barrington

Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule - and both commonly succeed, and are right. - H. L. Mencken

Vacations should always be just long enough for your boss to miss you, but not so long he finds out he can really do quite well without you. - Unknown

Vegetarianism is harmless enough, though it is apt to fill a man with wind and self-righteousness. - Robert Hutchinson

Visits always give pleasure: if not on arrival, then on the departure. - Edouard Le Berquier

Vote ... the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country. - Ambrose Bierce

Watching football is like watching pornography. There’s plenty of action, and I can’t take my eyes off it, but when it’s over, I wonder why the hell I spent an afternoon doing it. - Luke Salisbury

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