Monday, 31 August 2015

Humorous Quotes

Humorous, quirky quotes – some of which are also profoundly true.

A drunken man's words are a sober man's thoughts. - Unknown

Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you. - Unknown

Every woman in choosing a lover takes more account of the way in which other women regard the man than of her own. - Chamfort

Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs. - Anonymous

Gold, gold! It may not buy happiness, but it can buy you a better state of misery, that's for sure! - Count Duckula

Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't; the other half have nothing to say and keep saying it. - Lenny Laskowski

If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts. - Albert Einstein

If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. - Unknown

It is much better to want the mate you do not have than to have the mate you do not want. - Unknown

Nothing pleases a woman quite so well as to look so sweet that a man wants to kiss her, and then abuse him for his impudence. - Edgar Watson Howe

The ideal man doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, doesn't do drugs, doesn't swear, doesn't get angry, doesn't exist. - Unknown

You don't know a woman until you've met her in court. - Norman Mailer

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