Saturday, 20 June 2020

Cheap Medicine

Life would be dull, and gloomy if people did not have a sense of humour, if there were no laughter. It is through humour, and laughter, that we soften some of life’s demand on us. And once we can find laughter, no matter how painful the situation might be, we can survive it.

Cultivate, and develop your sense of humour because it is when things are not going well that we need our humour most.

Alcohol removes inhibitions – like that scared little mouse who got drunk and shook his whiskers and shouted: “Now bring on that damn cat!” - Eleanor Early

I wonder if Mr. Right really exists? I’ve already met Mr. Player, Mr Psycho, Mr. Lazy, Mr User, Mr. Cheap, Mr. Married, and Mr. Stalker. - Unknown

I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I’d be a college graduate today. - George Foreman

I never said all Democrats were saloon keepers. What I said was that all saloon keepers are Democrats. - Horace Greeley

I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird. - Frank Zappa

Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet. - Robin Williams

All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them. - Erma Bombeck

I reckon being ill as one of the great pleasures of life, provided one is not too ill and is not obliged to work till one is better. - Samuel Butler

Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer. - Ellen DeGeneres

Advice to children crossing the street: damn the lights. Watch the cars. The lights ain’t never killed nobody. - Moms Mabley

Please Lord, let me prove that winning the lottery won't spoil me. - Unknown

I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. He told me to wear a brown tie. - Rodney Dangerfield

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