English Church Bulletins as they actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services (Adapted from a variety of sources including Funny Church Bulletin Board Notices):
The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
The sermon this morning: ‘Jesus Walks on Water.’ The sermon tonight: ‘Searching for Jesus.’
Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been cancelled due to a conflict.
Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say ‘Hello’ to someone who doesn’t care much about you.
Don’t let worry kill you off – let the Church help.
Miss Charlene Mason sang ‘I will not pass this way again,’ giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing: ‘Break Forth Into Joy.’
Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October Tewenty-four in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be ‘What Is Hell?’ Come early and listen to our choir practice.
Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
Scouts are saving aluminium cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.
Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 p.m. – prayer and medication to follow.
The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
This evening at 7 p.m. there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 a.m. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done. Source unknown