Paraprosdokians

Some humour is straight forward. You see, or hear them, and you burst out laughing. Others are more subtle. You need a second or two, to see the humour in them.

Paraprosdokians are an example, the punch line is dropped a second or two later, giving what was said an entirely different meaning, wherein lies the humour. You will notice a lot of these in comedy shows. Stand-Up comedians use them a lot to get the laughs too.

Enjoy this selection of paraprosdokians. May your week ahead be filled with laughter.

Forget about the past, you can’t change it. Forget about the future, you can’t predict it. Forget about the present, I didn’t buy you one. - Unknown

The older generation thought nothing of getting up at five every morning – and the younger generation doesn’t think much of it either. - John J. Welsh

Just burned 2000 calories. That’s the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap. - Unknown

Ever since it started snowing my husband is standing in front of the window and watching. If the snow gets much worse, I might let him inside the house. - Unknown

If your eyes hurt after you drink coffee, you have to take the spoon out of the cup! - Unknown

By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity. Another man's, I mean. - Mark Twain

I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one’s wife happy. First, let her think she’s having her own way. And second, let her have it. - Lyndon B. Johnson

If you want your children to be intelligent, read them fairy tales. If you want them to be more intelligent, read them more fairy tales. - Albert Einstein

Yesterday I wore something from 5 years ago, and it fitted. So proud of myself. It was a scarf. But still. Let’s be positive here. - Unknown

It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like “What about lunch? - A. A. Milne

The most important things to do in the world are to get something to eat, something to drink and somebody to love you. - Brendan Behan

We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations – we’re doing everything we can to keep our marriage together. - Rodney Dangerfield

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