Quips And Quirks

A sense of humour can help us get over the rough patches in life. Here are some humorous quips and quirks to help bring on a smile, or better still, a chuckle. Some of them are hilarious, some of them are funny but they also contain a lot of truth. Remember the ones you like, and help to spread the laughter. People who spread joy and laughter are usually well-liked.

The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin. - Mark Twain

It is not a sin if you crack a few laws now and then, just so long as you do not break any. - Unknown

When money talks, nobody cares what kind of grammar it uses. - Robert Elliott Gonzales

Dogs come when they’re called. Cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

You can have it all. You just can’t have it all at once. - Oprah Winfrey

It isn’t what they say about you, it’s what they whisper. - Errol Flynn

A friend in need is usually something you don’t need. - Unknown

The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

When philosophers try to be politicians they generally cease to be philosophers. - Walter Lippmann

Women cannot complain about men any more until they start getting better taste in them. - Bill Maher

The reason so many people turned up at his funeral is that they wanted to make sure he was dead. - Samuel Goldwyn

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

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